


Something To Believe In

by Waning_Grace



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Aftermath of Violence, Angel Dean Winchester, Angel Garth, Angel John, Angel Mary, Angel Sam Winchester, Angel bobby, Castiel goes to Hell, Crossroads Deals & Demons, Demon Deals, Demon/Human Relationships, F/M, Ghosts, Hallucinations, Hellhounds, Human Castiel (Supernatural), Human Gabriel (Supernatural), Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Major Character Death (temporary), Masturbation in Shower, Nightmares, Sex Club, Soul Selling, Temporary Character Death, Torture, Tortured Gabriel (Supernatural), depictions of hell, graphic nightmares, reverse verse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-17
Updated: 2020-11-17
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:20:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 15
Words: 42,589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27583307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Waning_Grace/pseuds/Waning_Grace
Summary: After the tragic loss of their family to a supernatural entity brothers Castiel and Gabriel Novak find themselves thrust into the hunting life. Nearly twenty years later they’re the best at what they do, although when it comes to family all bets are off. When Gabriel finds himself in an unexpected bind that ends in tragedy, it’s up to Castiel to save him–by any means necessary. Dean’s always been a dutiful angel, always following the orders of his garrison like a good little soldier. Unbeknownst to him change is on the way when he gets picked to helm a special mission to rescue a soul in Hell. He never imagined it’d end with him rescuing the most beautiful soul he’d ever seen. They’re an unusual pair; an unsure angel and a surly hunter, but surely between the two of them they can find something to believe in.
Relationships: Asmodeus & Gabriel (Supernatural), Balthazar & Castiel & Gabriel, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Gabriel (Supernatural) & Meg Masters
Comments: 14
Kudos: 28
Collections: DCBB 2020





	1. Chapter I

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! This is my first ever DCBB attempt and to my surprise it turned out to be much more of a passion project than I intended. That said, I'd like to give a big shout out to all my friends for encouraging and pushing me on because this never would have gotten finished without you! THANK YOU ALL!
> 
> I'd also like to thank the awesomely talented Aggiedoll for making such amazing art for the story! Here's the link to their lovely art: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27572392 Please go show them some love! <3
> 
> Please Note: This story takes place in the "Reverse-Verse" meaning the canonically human characters are angels (Sam, Dean, John, etc), and the canonically angel characters are humans (Castiel, Gabriel, etc.) If this is something you feel would bother you please do not read. Otherwise please heed the tags and take care of yourselves! <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Art in this chapter is from the awesomely talented Aggiedoll!

**THEN**

In his just shy of thirty two years of life Gabriel Novak could claim to have done some truly wild shit. It was hardly surprising as one didn’t grow up hunting monsters and ghosts and not come out of it without doing some truly odd things. All of that, however, seemed to pale in comparison to what he was about to do. And perhaps that was why he was hesitating to do it in the first place.

“You know,” Balthazar, Gabriel’s not long enough lost cousin, drawled as he eyed the shorter man. “Between the two of you I’d have pegged our dear Cassie as the reluctant one, not you.” His natural British accent made his words sound smug but the look he was giving Gabriel was anything but. If Gabriel didn’t know any better he’d say it was almost pity in those blue eyes staring at him. “I thought you wanted to have an adventure?”

From his spot leaning up against the brick wall of the alleyway Gabriel shrugged. The rough brick scratched at his leather jacket, something that normally he’d get pissed over but tonight he didn’t care. “I did.” He said, looking away. “I do.” Why was it so difficult to put what he was feeling into words? He huffed out a laugh and shifted again, this time bringing his arms up to cross over his chest. It was a cool night, unseasonably so for it not being early summer, and Gabriel felt himself shudder a little. It was just the cold, he told himself, and not the brightly lit red neon sign two doors down that read ‘THE INFERNO’ that was tossing him off his game. No, it was definitely the cold. “Are you sure about this?” He’d already asked Balthazar the same question twice now but he couldn’t help it. 

“Why Gabriel, are you _nervous_?” Balthazar asked, his fine eyebrows nearly reaching his hairline in surprise. “It’s just a club, love, nothing more.” At just a few years older, Balthazar had also witnessed some pretty crazy shit in his days but he never thought he’d see the day when his normally outgoing cousin would balk. The club life wasn’t suited to hunters-- obviously displayed by his cousin’s thin, grey long-sleeved henley underneath the leather jacket and the worn-out blue jeans--but that was what he was there for. Clubbing had become somewhat of a specialty to Balthazar over the years and he was damned good at it if he said so himself. 

“Just a club, eh?” Gabriel muttered, honey-colored eyes fixed on the sign in the distance. The Inferno was very much more than a club, at least from what he’d heard. Things had a tendency to go down there that didn’t happen in other clubs and Gabriel had to admit, despite himself, he was curious. The whole idea was Balthazar’s fault, obviously. He’d breezed into town just in time to help Gabriel and his younger brother Castiel finish the hunt they’d been on, when he decided it was time to spice up their life.

In true Balthazar fashion he’d declared a night at a sex club was what they all needed. _You need to relax, darlings! He’d cried, pinning first Gabriel then Castiel with his blue-eyed stare. Castiel had staunchly refused, to the surprise of nobody, but Gabriel on the other hand…_

Gabriel was curious as fuck, loath as he was to admit it. In addition to hunting and the wild shit he’d seen and done, the young hunter was no stranger when it came to sex. Though picking up women in the towns they visited on cases was a completely different thing from going to a specialized club, he was beginning to realize. The things one did at clubs like those were simply something he could only imagine and the possibilities were both arousing and terrifying in spades. It was one thing to love ‘em and leave ‘em the next day, but what if he screwed something up in the club? A place called The Inferno sounded ominous and the whole thing was very much fucking with Gabriel’s head in a way he didn’t like. “You’ve been in there before?” It was another question he’d already asked, but like the other he simply couldn’t help himself.

Balthazar rolled his eyes at the question as he moved closer to his cousin. While he didn’t lean up against the wall--there was no way he was wrinkling his suit thank you very much--he did lean in far enough to capture his attention. “Many, many times!” He declared, his smirk nearly as bright as the club’s neon sign. “It’s quite the experience, I assure you!” That was something he’d said in response to Gabriel’s questions, every single time. “You’ll love it if you just give it a chance!”

Gabriel scowled, turning his head so he was staring at the bland brick wall across the alley from them instead of his cousin. While he’d been all for the plan originally now that they were here, just a few steps away from actually going through with it he just...couldn’t. Something didn’t feel right, like a heaviness to his bones, and the more he languished on the feeling the worst it got. “What if I mess things up?” He finally asked at length; it was a new question and held all of his vulnerabilities in a few words. Because that was the root of the problem right there, wasn’t it: in a place like that something bad was bound to happen to those who went off the script of things. The mere thought made the ball of anxiety in Gabriel’s gut tighten all the more.

“You won’t mess anything up darling!” Balthazar laughed, the sound echoing in their narrow alleyway. “Really, this fretting isn’t like you! We both know you aren’t a virgin so what’s the problem, hmm?” The taller man leaned sideways, trying to meet Gabriel’s eyes again. “I’ve never seen you like this.” He noted, “I assure you nothing bad is going to happen. You’re going to have a delightful time; I can guarantee it!”

Damn Balthazar and his never wavering persuasion! Gabriel scowled all the harder when he suddenly had a face-full of the British man but it had no effect. It never had on Balth, but Gabriel still tried it. The smaller man squirmed, ignoring the noise his leather jacket made against the brick at his back, and thought. The uneasy feeling hadn’t abated despite his cousin’s somewhat pacifying words but what if he was just being stupid? _It’s just a club!_ He told himself, _not much different than any of the bars you’ve been in before._ It was a lie, and he knew it, but it was the convincing he needed. 

Taking a second to roll his eyes at himself and his fit of childishness Gabriel turned to face Balthazar. “Okay,” He said, caught somewhere between resigned and willing to do it. “Let’s do this.” The ‘ _before I change my mind’_ was left unsaid.

For all that he tried to look suave and cool Balthazar puffed up like an excited cat at Gabriel’s acquiescence. “You won’t regret this!” He gushed, looking positively delighted that his cousin had finally come ‘round. Then, before Gabriel had a chance to overthink things again, Balthazar reached out and grabbed him by the wrist. “No time like the present!” The British man declared as he practically dragged Gabriel down the alley behind him. “You’re going to love it, just you wait!”

It took all the effort he had not to fight back, but in the end Gabriel let himself be dragged towards the club’s entrance. He still didn’t feel right but perhaps it was just performance anxiety rearing its head? Yeah, that had to be it. “I hope you’re right…” He muttered as they got closer. The Inferno’s sign looked down from above, casting an eerie red glow on their skins. _Gods, I hope he’s right!_

__


	2. Chapter II

Gabriel was going to  _ kill  _ Balthazar. The shorter man had made up his mind as he neared the club’s entrance because just what was his cousin playing at here? If the Inferno was really as prestigious as Balthazar claimed it was then why was there nobody around? Despite its location tucked into a back alleyway Gabriel had expected lines. Hell, he’d expected lines upon lines of sharply dressed people acting like this was just another club they couldn’t wait to get into. But now that he was faced with the complete opposite of it he couldn’t help feel uneasy. 

“Where is everyone?” He finally asked, unable to stop the words from tumbling out when they were less than a foot from the door. His feet ground to a halt as well like his mouth and they had somehow been connected via string. 

“Hmm? What was that, love?” Balthazar asked. He’d been in front of Gabriel but seeing that his cousin had stopped, he did so as well, and turned to face him. “What’s wrong now?” He asked, completely baffled that they were stopping yet again.

“Where’s all the people? Shouldn’t there be lines trying to get in?” Gabriel repeated, brow furrowed as he took in the dark and clearly deserted alleyway around them. Just the sight of it set his hunter senses tingling and that usually meant bad things were afoot. He shifted nervously, grateful when he could feel the presence of his favorite knife snugly situated in his waistband. 

“Oh Gabriel, you are a hoot!” Balthazar said before bursting into highly inappropriate laughter. He chuckled like he’d been told the funniest joke ever, nearly doubling over with the effort. 

For his part Gabriel simply stared, open mouthed, at his cousin’s antics. What the hell was going on here? He hadn’t said anything that funny! As someone who prided himself on being a bit of a jokester Gabriel knew funny and none of that had been it! “Are you outta your gourd?” He wondered when it didn’t seem like Balthazar was going to stop laughing anytime soon. It’d been a while since he’d seen his cousin after all, it wasn’t like either one of them could afford to fly to and from London on a whim, but still. Gabriel hadn’t imagined the older man to be cracked in the head, but anything was possible in their line of work!

“No, no! What?” Balthazar gasped out between chuckles, shaking his head. He still looked far too amused for his own good when he straightened up and brought a hand up to rub at the tears that had formed in his eyes. “I simply couldn’t help it! Surely you must have known how hilarious you sounded!”

“Hilarious?” Gabriel parroted, still flummoxed. “What the hell?” He finally complained. He was rapidly reaching his limits with this whole idea and they hadn’t even made it to (or through) the door yet! “Just answer the question Balth!”

“Oh what a party pooper!” Balthazar pouted, finally reigning himself back under control again. “Why would there be lines, hmm?” He asked, giving his cousin a patented ‘you are so dumb but I love you anyway’ look. “I believe I told you this was a  _ secret  _ club, did I not? I know you didn’t have the educational opportunities I did but surely you understand that secret things don’t usually come with lines of people who know about them!”

Gabriel blinked, taken aback. Fuck, Balthazar was right! Now that he took a moment to pause and think about it he did remember Balth mentioning that the place was a secret club. He sighed, all the wind taken out of his suspicious sails as he stared at his cousin. “Shit. I forgot.” He said, letting the jab about his education go; Gabriel knew he wasn’t the smartest guy out there so there was no reason to debate it. 

“It’s alright,” Balthazar said, surprisingly gentle, as he took a few steps towards Gabriel. “Do you still want to go inside? I promise you’ll enjoy it but if you want I’m sure we can find some place else still open.”

Gabriel frowned, torn between getting the hell out of there and going through with it. He knew his indecision and dragging feet were putting Balthazar off and he couldn’t blame him. The guy wanted to go out and have fun and here Gabriel was being a stick in the mud about it. The thing was Gabriel  _ didn’t  _ want to be a killjoy about things. He wanted to go inside the club and see if all his cousin’s hype was worth it or not. It was just...he couldn’t shake the feeling that something big was about to happen. Call it paranoia, call it a hunter’s sixth sense, call it whatever, but the feeling was there and persistent.

_ Cassie would tell me to go with my gut _ , Gabriel thought as he looked between Balthazar and the dark red, almost the color of blood, door to the Inferno. Castiel had been the smart one, deciding to remain in the hotel for the night. It was something Gabriel would have chafed at when there was a better offer on the table but he was starting to think his little brother had the right idea. On the other hand, was he really going to let something as insignificant as a feeling hold him back from something he wanted to do?  _ Just do it!!  _ A voice that sounded suspiciously like Balthazar’s sounded in his head and Gabriel hung his head because he knew he wasn’t going to be able to resist. All the bad feelings in the world couldn’t compete with the curiosity that would inevitably rise until the hunter went through with going into the club.  _ Besides,  _ the voice piped up again,  _ at least Balthazar is here with you in case something happens! _

That as good as settled it in his mind: squaring his shoulders, Gabriel lifted his head and went marching past Balthazar. Not giving himself time to think about it anymore he went straight for the red door of the club. With Balthazar hovering behind him, Gabriel threw caution to the wind, lifted a hand, and knocked on the door.


	3. Chapter III

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning Note: This chapter contains Major Character Death at the end.

Castiel Novak was going to  _ kill  _ his brother, and quite possibly to a lesser extent, their cousin as well. Four days. It had been four freaking, agonizingly long days since Gabriel and Balthazar had gone club-hopping and Castiel hadn’t seen hide nor hair of either of them since. While the two were no doubt having a good ‘ole time Castiel had been stuck up in the shoddy hotel room they’d rented worrying himself sick. He’d taken to pacing the room since, and could probably accurately map it with his eyes closed at this point. It didn’t help; nothing had. 

It was bad enough every time Balthazar dropped off the face of the Earth but did he really have to take Gabriel with him this time? Gabriel was the only family Castiel had, and despite their rough and tumble lives as hunters, the thought of losing his older brother sent ice thrumming through his bones. It was beyond weird to have such a relationship to his brother, Castiel knew, but Gabriel was all he had in the world beyond a few measly possessions and his car. The fact that he obviously didn’t feel the same enough to give his brother a call or send a text stung more than Castiel wanted to admit.

With a growl Castiel paused in mid-stride and brought a hand up to run through his hair. It was a nervous habit that often ended in his head looking like a bird’s nest but he couldn’t help doing it. He was just so beyond frustrated he didn’t even have the words for how he currently felt. His blue eyed gaze swept the room, unseeing, before determination suddenly clicked in. What was he doing wasting his time here? Clearly neither Gabriel nor Balthazar thought his time was worthy of acknowledging so why should he do the same? Castiel had the only car amongst the three and it’d more than serve them right if he took off without them!

Mind made up, Castiel looked around the hotel room with more purpose. As a general rule neither he nor Gabriel left much laying around in case they had to leave in a hurry which meant half the work was already done. Gabriel’s duffel lay open and forgotten amongst the unmade covers of his bed to which Castiel rolled his eyes. Unlike his older brother, Castiel believed in keeping things neat and tidy--including making the hotel beds back up. It was a source of playful contention between the brothers since they knew the beds would just get remade anyway but it was a habit Castiel hadn’t been able to break. With that in mind he strutted over to Gabriel’s bed and chucked his duffel onto the floor. Carefully maneuvering around it, Castiel set to straightening the sheets and blankets back into place. It didn’t take long, and having finished, Castiel was in the process of picking Gabriel’s duffel back up when the hotel door abruptly slammed open. Castiel didn’t hesitate to react---he dived between the beds only to pop up a second later, brandishing his pistol at the doorway. There, backlit from the sunlight pouring in from the parking lot, was the last thing Castiel expected to see after such an entrance: “Balthazar?”

Castiel was beyond baffled; it wasn’t like their unflappable older cousin to come bursting into places like he had. “What’s going on? Where’s Gabe?” He asked as he lowered his pistol and began crossing the room towards him. “Is this some kind of prank? Were you two trying to scare me?” That was something Castiel wouldn’t have put past the two of them but as he stopped a good foot from the door he began to wonder if this was a prank at all.

Balthazar, for his part, hadn’t said a word. He merely stood there, or rather slumped wearily against the door frame as his cousin made his way closer. It wasn’t until Castiel asked about a joke that he finally made a sound, and then it was a dark sarcastic chuckle. Oh, but how he wished this was a joke!

“What happened?” Castiel wondered from where he’d abruptly stopped. Something about this whole thing didn’t feel right and he found himself frozen in place. The hand that still held the pistol gripped it tightly just in case… “Balth, where’s Gabe?” He asked, though Castiel was suddenly unsure if he wanted to hear the answer. Even at a distance his cousin was too pale, and was that blood on his knuckles? 

“..Cassie.” The British man’s voice cracked, and like a dam breaking, his resolve went along with it. Horrified, Castiel could only watch as Balthazar’s face crumpled and his shoulders shook under the force of his sudden sobs. 

Something truly wrong had happened, Castiel thought distantly, feeling somewhat detached from the moment. It was a trait that had served him well as a hunter but now that he was faced with his family hurting he only felt numb. Where was Gabriel? One eye still on Balthazar, he couldn’t help glancing behind him out into the parking lot as if waiting for Gabriel to pop over his shoulder laughing. It wasn’t like him, or Balth for that matter, to let a joke go on like this, so why was he? Where was Gabriel hiding?

“You...I..We need to go..” Balthazar stumbled over the words, his voice full of anguish. He didn’t even look at Castiel, just turned and headed back out the door with the knowledge that his cousin would certainly follow.

He wasn’t wrong; Castiel lasted all of a handful of seconds blinking after him before he found himself following. Once out the door he blinked, startled by the bright sunlight that seemed in direct contrast with Balthazar’s mood. To his even greater surprise the older man hadn’t even gone that far--he was standing beside the passenger’s side door to Castiel’s car. “Balth?” Cas couldn’t help query, even as he made his way towards the car.

“Get in and drive.” Balthazar seemed to have gotten a handle on himself but his eyes were still red-rimmed and he looked like a good gust of wind could shatter him once more. He didn’t offer up any more details, like just where they were supposed to be driving to.

Castiel thought seriously about objecting but at the last second he found himself hesitating. There was simply something about the way Balthazar was acting that had him treading the line of caution. Instead he unlocked the doors and got inside. Balthazar did the same on the other side, and before Castiel knew where they were heading they were pulling out of the parking lot.

“Head south. Take the next right and pull over at the mouth of the alley.” Balthazar instructed, his gaze focused on the road in front of him.

It took everything in him to keep from interjecting, but somehow Castiel managed it. He bit his tongue until he felt the familiar coppery taste of blood begin to fill his mouth. It was gross, but it worked to keep him occupied as he wordlessly followed the directions. Before he knew it he was pulling up to a stop outside the alleyway just as Balthazar had instructed. But, before Cas could ask for further details his cousin was up and out of the car, heading down the alley. “What the hell?” Cas muttered as he turned off the car and got out. 

This whole thing was getting beyond odd, even for Gabriel’s usual style of things. Castiel glanced around as he rounded the car but nothing seemed out of place. The alley looked like most others with nothing clearly visible beyond an overflowing dumpster and the smell of refuse in the air. Yet, there at the end was none other than Balthazar, crouched down beside something Castiel couldn’t make out. From a distance it looked like a pile of garbage, but what would his cousin want with garbage?

Baffled, Castiel made his way down the alley only to freeze in his tracks. That wasn’t garbage Balthazar was crouched so protective besides: it was Gabriel. Castiel felt his throat close up as he simply stared at his older brother’s limp form. There was blood, so much of it there was barely a piece of clothing or skin that hadn’t been stained by it. Beneath the tint his skin was pale, almost wazy, but it was the eyes that made Castiel’s heart freeze in his chest. Those honey-whiskey colored orbs he knew and loved so well were wide open and staring sightlessly up at the sky. It was impossible to deny; the proof laid out right there in front of him in a dirty back alleyway: Gabriel was dead.


	4. Chapter IV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Warning: This chapter contains one of the character's making a demon deal at the crossroads to sell their soul.
> 
> Art in this chapter is by Aggiedoll!

A loud ringing started in Castiel’s ears, drowning out the world around him. How? How had this happened? Balthazar’s mouth was moving, his cousin possibly explaining, but Castiel was beyond hearing him. His whole world had tunnel-visioned down to the dead man in front of him; everything else was irrelevant. No matter what had happened his brother was dead and Castiel’s life was crumbling right there before his eyes. 

No. 

No! 

**NO!**

He wasn’t going to let it! Gabriel, the brother who’d been there since before Castiel could talk, who’d been there through thick & thin, couldn’t be dead. He simply _couldn’t_ be! The eyes could deceive you, Castiel knew. He’d seen, or rather thought he’d seen, enough things growing up hunting to know one couldn’t fully trust what they were seeing in front of him. Denial didn’t make his brother sit up and yell “Gotcha!” however, no matter how much Castiel wished it to be so.

He was turning away before he even realized he’d done it. The alleyway swum in his vision as he turned but Castiel ignored it just as surely as he ignored the tears streaming down his face. He refused to let this farce continue on; he’d fix this, one way or another. A part of his mind registered Balthazar yelling behind him and the feel of a hand grabbing his shoulder but Castiel pushed it all away. Nothing else mattered beyond helping Gabriel. If it was the last thing he would do Castiel was going to save Gabriel’s life.

He didn’t even register getting back into the car, or even driving. It was just like between one blink and the next the world had shifted around him and instead of a brick alleyway Castiel found himself at a dirt crossroads. Night had fallen somewhere along the way, casting everything in shadows but that was fine by Castiel. There was no need for daylight in what he was about to do.

He got out of the car, completely oblivious to the way his back twinged after sitting so long. His mind was a churning mess of ‘Gabriel. I have to save Gabriel’ as he rounded the car towards the trunk. Popping the lid he dove into nearly a lifetime of hunter paraphernalia as his hands worked automatically. It took a surprisingly long time and yet no time at all before Castiel found himself marching to the center of the crossroads with what amounted to his life in his hands. 

The hard edge of the unfinished wooden box bit into his hands but Castiel barely cared as he fell to his knees in the dirt. There, silhouetted by the headlights from the car, and head bowed, he finally paused. There would be no coming back from this, he knew. No second chances. No take-backs. Once he did this Castiel would be completely, irredeemably, damned. 

But what choice did he have? Gabriel was all he had left in this world. Balthazar was family, yes, but it wasn’t the same. Gabriel had been there for nearly all of Castiel’s life; he couldn’t fathom going on without him. What would he even _do_ ? Continue hunting? Castiel was good enough to make it on his own but that didn’t mean he wanted to. The thought of continuing on by himself until he was finally taken out by some random monster made his chest tighten. The truth was simple: while he could hunt alone _he didn’t want to._

Mind settled, he moved before he could allow himself to think about it further. He pawed at the dirt like a dog preparing to bury a bone, and the thought made a hysterical chuckle slip out. He dug just far enough to drop the box in before smoothing the dirt back over the top again. In moments it looked like nothing had even disturbed the spot.

Now all there was to do was wait. 

And wait.

...And wait.

….And wait.

Castiel didn’t know how long he knelt there in the dirt; time seeming to blur around him. Nothing, however, happened. Absolutely nothing. A lifetime of growing up with horror stories about selling your soul to the devil at the crossroads and nothing was happening! Castiel didn’t know whether to laugh or to cry; he was fairly sure once he started either one he wasn’t going to be able to stop. What the hell? Or well, why the lack of hell? Castiel had heard the stories, he’d met demons, so why wasn’t this working?

Eventually he had to move. It had been long enough his legs had locked up under him, his knees stiff and unyielding. It was a slow way up but he made it...only to nearly go down again at the unexpected sound of an unfamiliar voice speaking up behind him: “It’s about time!”

Castiel whirled, nearly face-planting back into the dirt from his stiff legs, shocked to find a woman standing not three feet away from him. How long had she been standing there? He hadn’t heard anyone come up behind him! Then her words sunk in and left him gaping in confusion, “About time?” He parroted, caught flat-foot about this whole ordeal thus far.

The strange woman was a good head shorter than Castiel with pale skin, wavy dark hair and equally dark eyes as she looked him over. It was like looking at a shark that had found its next meal, and an unsettled feeling rose up in Castiel’s gut underneath her gaze. She wore tight black jeans, black boots, and a black leather jacket over a purple shirt; had this been another time and place she would have been the type Castiel would have tried to pick up. As it was her beauty barely registered as the hunter watched the way she tilted her head back and laughed.

It wasn’t a nice sound, more like nails on a chalkboard that made Castiel flinch under the weight of it. “I’ve been waiting for you.” The woman said simply, shrugging like this wasn’t the most unusual interaction Castiel could lay claim to having. “I didn’t think you were ever going to get up!”

Despite himself he flushed, caught between annoyed and mortified that she’d seen him kneeling in the dirt for so long. What would she have done if a demon had shown up after all? “What are you doing here?” It seemed like a safe question to ask, all things considered.

It was like he’d asked the magic question--immediately the woman straightened up and fixed him with a gaze that would have made anyone’s flesh start to crawl. The shark-like smirk on her face grew larger, and was it just Castiel’s imagination or did she really look like she was ready to eat him alive? 

Between one blink and the next the illusion shattered; the woman looked no different than from before, though now she did look a bit bored. “Well, that all depends on you there, handsome.” 

Realization sunk in the same second her eyes switched to bright red hellfire, confirming his fears: she was the demon he’d been waiting for. Fear suddenly clawed it’s icy way into his chest but Cas wasn’t having it; he couldn’t afford to screw up now. Distantly he thought he could hear Gabriel’s voice screaming at him to run. Another time, a different circumstance, and he probably would have turned tail and bolted for it. Now, though? Now he didn’t even blink; he let the full weight of his cold blue stare meet the burning red gaze and held it. He was afraid but fear could be tamed. ‘Never let them see you afraid,’ a wise person had once told him and Cas took it to heart now. He swallowed hard, the only outward sign of his nerves, and stared death in the face without flinching. 

Surprisingly it was the demon who cracked first. It tossed its vessels head back and laughed. “I like you!” It declared with a saucy grin and a wink. 

If Castiel had felt flat-footed before it was nothing compared to the shock running through him now. “...Was that meant as a flirtation?” He grumbled, hating the way he could feel his face flame. Nobody had said anything about demons flirting during their deal making!

That garnered another laugh out of the demon as it smirked widely at him. “If only we had the time!” It sighed dramatically as it sashayed closer to him. 

Part of Castiel had to admit the demon knew what it was doing with the way it made the women's hips sway enticingly. If he’d been a lesser man he could admit he’d probably have been taken in by the whole package…

The demon grinned like it’d been reading his damned mind, and who knew, it probably had been. Case in point: it pouted those dark painted lips at him before saying sadly “Unfortunately for you we need to get down to business. The clock’s ticking down on your dear brother the longer you stall here.”

Castiel opened his mouth to hotly retort that _he_ hadn’t been the one who was stalling, but he closed it at the last second. Semantics hardly mattered when in the end it boiled down to the demon was correct: they needed to get a move on here. “What do I have to do?” He growled, straightening his back and looking every inch the deadly hunter that he was.

“Oooh so strong and determined!” The demon all but cooed, even going so far to bring a hand up to its borrowed chest. “I like that in a man!” Before Castiel could even begin thinking of a reply for that one he found himself hauled in impossibly closer to the demon by an invisible hand. He stiffened, only to be met with its face mere inches away from his own. “As fun as this is let’s talk turkey, shall we?” 

“I already know how this works!” Cas snapped, suddenly angry with the whole dog and pony show. He knew what he was doing; it was better to just get on with it. “You get my soul and I get ten years.”

“Oh you’re a feisty one, aren’t you?” The demon teased, clearly delighted at winding him up. “But that’s not the way this is going to work.” It declared, some of the amusement bleeding out of its voice. “You aren’t stupid, and neither am I Castiel Novak.” The demon paused there and hummed like it was considering something before all at once lighting up. “How about...One year. Take it or leave it.”

One year? Only one? Castiel felt the anger drain out of him along with most of the blood in his face, leaving him dizzy. Ten years had been doable but to only have one more before an eternity in the Pit? Fear thrummed in his bones and all he could think about in the moment was Gabriel. His older brother wouldn’t have wanted this for him, Castiel knew. He would give him such an ass reaming for even considering such a thing but...that was the point, right? One year wasn’t what he had planned but it’d be worth it, wouldn’t it? Gabriel would be alive and that was all that truly mattered to Castiel. “Fine.” He finally growled out, putting all his determination behind the one word.

“Ah. Ah. Not so fast!” The demon chided, somehow managing to hold up a finger between them to waggle in Castiel’s face. “There’s a catch, don’cha know? You even think about breaking this and dear big brother drops dead just like that!” It snapped to drive the point home. “Same thing applies to him as well; if he or anyone else tries to break the contract he’s a dead man walking and there won’t be any coming back the second time!”

_Dammit!_ Castiel closed his eyes against the sudden rush of pain surging through him at the demon’s words. He’d foolishly hoped there’d be some way to break the contract before his time came due but that was no longer an option now. He gave himself five long seconds to mourn the life he was willingly throwing away before he opened his eyes again. Meeting the demon’s fiery red gaze again he finally surrendered. Before he could let himself think about what he was doing Castiel found himself kissing the demon full on the lips. It was a filthy kiss; it tasted like sulphur and death, but Castiel gave as good as he got, making it battle for every inch of dominance. It was stupid considering he’d sealed his fate as surely as they sealed their lips but he’d never been one to back down.

Finally the demon pushed him back, that smug shark-grin full on its face as it eyed him over. “Not bad for a hunter,” it all but purred, “not bad at all. Too bad you won’t need those skills where you’re going!” 

It was time to go. Castiel found himself inching back, little by little towards the safety of his headlights and his car. In front of him the demon just cackled, a knowing look on its face. “Maybe we can hook up in another couple hundred years?” It jeered, clearly enjoying itself. “We could make a hot team, you and I!!!” 

Annnd it was _definitely_ time to go… Castiel gave up all pretenses of trying to be subtle and flat out ran for it. He didn’t care how it looked for him to be running away like a little kid who’d gotten in too deep; he needed to get out of there. Now. He scrambled into the car with the sounds of maniacal laughter filling his ears. It was a relief when he finally slammed the door shut, cutting off the horrible sound. 

Castiel leaned forward, resting his head on the steering wheel. _Jesus_...What had he done? The stoic side of him crumpled like a house of cards as the full weight of what Castiel had just done bore down on him. He’d literally sold his soul to the devil, and what was he getting in return? A year. Three hundred and sixty five days in which to try to explain to Gabriel just why he’d done what he did. 

Gabriel… The thought of his brother bolstered him enough into sitting upright in the seat as hope slowly began to fill his chest. Castiel may have only gotten a year for himself but Gabriel was alive! That was worth anything, even the looming fear of Hell, and suddenly the only thing Cas wanted was to see him. He needed to see for himself that his brother was safe and sound; he didn’t think he'd truly settle until he did. 

Mind made up, he turned the car back on, and risked a glance out the windshield into the darkness. That was all there was to see outside the small circle of light left by the headlights; the demon was gone. Castiel found himself breathing a sigh of relief as he turned the car around, though it was short lived. Despite being in a moving vehicle and the demon clearly gone, he couldn’t help but feeling he was being watched. There was a brand of glowing red eyes centered in the circle of his back and Castiel knew without a doubt the sensation was there to stay. No point in losing one's prey at this stage of the game, right?

Compared to the eternity it took to get to the crossroads the way back was accomplished in no time at all. Before Castiel was prepared for it he found himself pulling back into the familiar parking lot at the hotel. There he simply turned off the car and stared at his and Gabriel’s hotel door without truly seeing it. What if he’d somehow failed and Gabriel was still dead? Part of him was demanding to go see immediately but the bigger part of him hesitated. The only thing worse than selling his soul would be finding out it was all for naught; Castiel didn’t think he could bear it. If it turned out to be true he wouldn’t have to wait to find out first hand what Hell was like--he’d eat a bullet right there and get it over with. The demon he’d made acquaintances with would be thrilled, he thought idly as he continued staring into space.

Thankfully for him, Castiel wouldn’t have to resort to such measures as the hotel door flung wide open. It rebounded, but the person who’d opened it was too fast---Castiel got a glimpse of blood and familiar eyes before the driver’s side door was being flung open as well. “Please tell me you didn’t do what I think you did!” Gabriel growled lowly, viciously pissed. He didn’t even wait for a reply before he was wrapping his arms around his little brother and clinging to him tightly like he’d disappear before his eyes.

Gabriel. Castiel’s eyes misted over without his permission and he thought he heard someone whimper but he just didn’t give a damn. He clung back to Gabriel all the same and didn’t deign to answer; they both knew what he’d say anyway.

Gabriel was just getting started, or perhaps he hadn’t even finished talking as he continued whispering harshly against Castiel’s head. “--Can’t believe you’d do something so selfish kiddo! What were you thinking?”

Wait. What? Back the fuck up! Castiel blinked, anger flipping a switch inside as he pulled back just far enough to look his older brother in the eyes. “Selfish? _Selfish?!”_ He growled back, unable to reign himself in. “Are you listening to yourself? How am _I_ selfish for saving your ass? _You’re_ the one who went off with Balthazar and didn’t even bother letting me know where you were or anything! I thought you’d found yourselves another hunt and then Balth came crashing in and led me to your corpse! How do you think that went!?” Castiel’s voice was rising in volume and he was fairly sure it was starting to echo since the car door was still wide open but he didn’t care. He was so furious he didn’t give a damn if the whole world heard him chew Gabriel out; his brother deserved it!

Gabriel blinked, obviously taken aback by the venom in his brother’s voice. He gaped wordlessly for a moment before deflating all at once like someone had let all the air out of him. “Cas…” He sighed, his gaze flitting away from the furious blue eyes staring at him. “It wasn’t supposed to be like that.” He said, the words so quiet they were practically a whisper. “Balth took me to a club, I didn’t expect what happened to happen.”

That had to have been the lamest excuse Castiel had ever heard in his life. He opened his mouth to say as much only to find himself stopping at the look on his brother’s face. He was still angry, there was no denying that, but Gabriel wasn’t joking right now. “What happened out there?” He finally asked, voice soft. If he didn’t know any better he’d almost classify the look on his brother’s face as scared and Castiel didn’t know what to do with that. 

Gabriel’s face hardened though the look in his eyes was nothing short of haunted. He didn’t say anything for several long seconds and the sudden silence between them was suffocating. “Believe me when I say you don’t want to know.” He finally said at last in a broken quiet voice that Castiel had never heard before. “I’m serious Castiel; you really don’t want to know.”

More than anything else the fact that Gabriel used his full name shocked Castiel into listening. Gabriel was a man full of ridiculous nicknames and usually called Castiel everything except his actual name. The fact that he was willing to use his name now was both shocking and just proved the seriousness of his words. Silently, Castiel nodded. He was willing to let it drop...for now. Somewhere down the line he was sure he’d get to the truth of the matter. 

He got a wan smile in response from Gabriel but that was it. Fortunately for the both of them a third head popped up just over Gabriel’s shoulder, scowling at the both of them. “Are the two of you about done with this love fest?” Balthazar drawled, his thick accent making his words sound bored. “Because the neighbors are starting to stare and frankly that seems more trouble than either of you need right now.” Just like that he was gone again, disappearing back into the relative safety of the hotel room.

The brothers blinked, both startled out of their own private thoughts. A quick glance revealed Balthazar was right; there were at least half a dozen eyes peering at them from behind the curtains of the surrounding rooms and Castiel couldn’t help let out a sigh. This certainly wasn’t what he had expected to come back to but he couldn’t complain. Gabriel was alive, and while he wasn’t alright now, he would be eventually. It was enough; it had to be. Squirming free of his brother’s hold, Castiel finally shoved his way out of the car. He stalked to the hotel door without looking back; he didn’t need to, he knew Gabriel would follow.


	5. Chapter V

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter warning: This chapter contains MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH, Castiel hallucinating before his deal comes due, depictions of Hellhounds that may be upsetting, and Castiel being taken to hell.

**NOW**

Castiel sighed, long and deep. The sound of it echoed in the quiet confines of the car but it thankfully wasn’t enough to wake his sleeping passenger. Castiel was eternally thankful for that--it’d been a battle to get Gabriel to go to sleep in the first place. He wasn’t proud of it but Cas had finally resorted to crushing up sleeping pills in his brother’s morning coffee just to force him to get some shut-eye. The result was a two-edged sword; on one hand Gabriel was finally resting but on the other Castiel was left alone with nothing but his thoughts.

He glanced away from the road long enough to cast a glare in Gabriel’s direction for the little good it’d do. It was his own damn fault he was stuck in this mess but that didn’t mean Castiel had to like it. What was there to like when the clock was ticking further and further down before his eyes? He turned back to the road, and tried not to think about it. He failed miserably, just like he had for all the intervening months. It had been three hundred and sixty three days since his fateful trip to the crossroads and time was running out.

Despite the demon’s warnings Castiel and Gabriel had lost a few months trying to research a way to get out of the deal to no avail. There was no evidence of anyone breaking a crossroads deal, human or demon alike. There were no loopholes to jump through and no last minute plans despite Gabriel’s fervent hope. Which was how they’d landed here with Castiel drugging his brother to the gills. It was underhanded and dirty but Castiel couldn’t stand the  _ guilt  _ that practically oozed out of every one of Gabriel’s pore’s. It was obvious to anyone within a two mile radius the older brother blamed himself for Castiel’s fate. 

It was ridiculous and completely unnecessary because the one person whose opinion mattered--Castiel’s--was completely ignored. Unlike his older brother Castiel didn’t blame anyone but himself for his circumstances. He went to the crossroads of his own volition and he’d do the same thing again and again. They’d had more than one fight about it over the months and frankly Castiel was reaching the end of his rope over it. He’d be the first to admit he didn’t want to die and the fact that Gabriel was acting otherwise hurt more than he was willing to admit. If his own brother didn’t believe him, who would? 

“You are a pain in the ass!” Castiel finally declared in a huff, the first words he’d spoken since Gabriel had nodded off. “I can’t believe you don’t trust me.” He went on, deciding he might as well get everything off his chest while he had a captive audience even if said audience didn’t hear a word he said. “”You are possibly the most pig-headed stubborn son of a bitch I’ve ever met and--”

“Geez Cassie! Tell me how you really feel!” A groggy reply from the passenger seat broke Castiel off mid-rant. Somewhere along the line Gabriel had woken up and was now eyeing his brother up like he’d somehow grown two heads in the handful of hours he’d been asleep. “I do trust you.” Gabriel said, watching Castiel carefully. “I--I’ve made a mess of this whole thing, haven’t I? I didn’t mean to make you feel like shit, kiddo.”

Castiel froze like he was in some cheap predator movie and if he didn’t move he couldn’t be seen. It was a moot point since he was driving the car but it didn’t make his shoulders lower from his ears as he glanced over at his brother. “What are you doing up? We won’t reach Reedsville until dusk at the earliest.” He deflected, completely ignoring Gabriel’s words. It wasn’t that he didn’t believe him--he did--but the last thing Castiel wanted was coddled. They were three hundred and sixty three days too late for that anyway.

Gabriel huffed as he straightened up in the seat and carefully attempted to stretch. He looked like a cross between a contortionist and a cat with the way he stretched. Any other time it probably would have been funny but neither of the brothers felt like laughing. “Gotta piss.” He finally grunted when enough time passed it seemed like he wasn’t going to answer. “How’s the car doing on gas?” It was a neutral target and Gabriel seemed to cling onto it with both hands. As long as Castiel would talk to him about something he was willing to roll with it.

Castiel wasn’t sure he believed Gabriel, it would hardly be surprising to find out his brother had been fake sleeping all this time, but he let it go. What was the point in arguing? Beyond that Castiel was tired of arguing. With only a handful of days left he just wanted things to be as peaceful as they could be. Which is why he pushed his doubts aside as he glanced down at the gas gauge. The needle was drifting below the half mark but Castiel figured that was enough; it wasn’t like they really had a place to be anyway. “It’s just past the half,” He finally said, his voice coming out oddly stilted as the swirl of emotions going on inside him hadn’t abated. With just barely a day left to him Castiel wondered if the feeling was going to continue to persist. He hoped not.

Beside him Gabriel grunted noncommittally and turned his head to look out the window beside him. Apparently he too was feeling the off effects in the car; normally Gabriel didn’t shut up for anything. The road they were traveling down was twisting, carefully winding through the bright green countryside. There were houses dotted here and there but ultimately there was far more greenery than anything else. Someone more poetic would have called it beautiful but neither brother noticed, each too lost in their own minds. 

The silence continued that way for some time until they rounded a curve and Castiel felt his breath catch in his throat. There, standing in a line coming down a grassy hill not twenty feet from the car, was Castiel and Gabriel’s family. It was the way he remembered them at least: their stern step mother Naomi with her hair pulled back in a severe bun; their perpetually frazzled father in his ratty bathrobe holding his coffee mug; his older brothers Michael and Lucifer, each with a nasty smirk on their faces; and there at the bottom their younger sister with a knowing look in her piercing blue eyes that matched his. 

Castiel swallowed hard; he felt like he was going to puke. What the hell was happening here? Even for a hunter it wasn’t exactly normal to be seeing dead members of one's family on a hill. Castiel stared until he couldn’t anymore; between one blink and the next his family was gone. A line of young trees stretching down the hill stood in their place and Castiel wondered if he’d gone off the deep end after all. Had that really happened? A glance over to his brother revealed Gabriel looking right back, concern in his honey colored eyes. “Are you okay there, bro?” Gabriel asked, a furrow settling between his brows as he continued studying Castiel. “You’re looking a little green around the gills.”

It was on the tip of Castiel’s tongue to blurt it all out but..he couldn’t. Obviously Gabriel hadn’t seen their family standing there and the only thing worse than admitting he was possibly hallucinating was being laughed at. Instead he shook his head, not the wisest of choices when he still felt like hurling, but after a lot of hasty swallowing he thought he had it under wraps. Still, it was a beat or two before Castiel felt confident enough to say: “I’m just tired of driving I think. Want to switch at the next stop?”

If anything Castiel’s willingness to let his brother drive his car, especially considering Gabriel often referred to it as a ‘pimp mobile’ was worrying. It got his big brother’s stony face set perfectly into a frown to which Castiel simply had to sigh because, really? Usually Gabriel would jump on any chance to drive rather than be confined to the passenger seat. It just figured today of all days he’d choose to be stubborn about it. “Fine.” Gabriel finally relented with a sigh, waving a hand at Castiel to emphasize his point. “Keep your secrets if you want. I’ll show you how to drive this beast properly.”

Castiel rolled his eyes so hard he thought they’d fall out of his head. Secretly, he was pleased, however, that his brother was willing to let it go. Knowing Gabriel he was sure to bring back up again and catch Castiel off guard but he’d take his wins when he could get them. “My car isn’t a beast!” He sniffed, reaching out to pat the dashboard. “It’s a classic!”

Beside him Gabriel took the bait like Castiel knew he would, and snorted back a laugh. “I don’t think anyone is going around calling rusty pimp mobiles classics there Casanova!” Gabriel jeered, though his tone was playful. “But if you want me to take this rust bucket out for a spin who am I to say no?”

“You’re so gracious,” Castiel deadpanned, his focus back out on the road. Why couldn’t his remaining time be more like this? He wondered, absently scanning for a gas station. No matter how annoying he found the banter between him and Gabriel sometimes (and who wouldn’t considering Gabe’s mouth?) he missed it. Things had been stilted and tense since Castiel had returned after his crossroads deal and he had absolutely zero idea of how to go about fixing them. They’d tried to hash things out a couple of times to little avail; it always ended coming to blows before they got very far. After a while Castiel had given up trying and Gabriel had stopped bringing it up. 

“Don’t you forget it either!” Gabriel crowed from the passenger seat, sounding pleased with himself. He’d gone back to staring out the window at the passing scenery but there was a lightness to him that hadn’t been there earlier. “How much longer do you think?”

Castiel shook his head, turning away so Gabriel couldn’t see the smirk tugging up the corners of his mouth. He looked out the windshield but all he could see was hills and more hills stretching in front of them. Who knew the countryside was so hilly? Castiel hadn’t but he was truly enjoying the drive nonetheless. There was something strangely soothing about seeing all the greenery around them coupled with the warm sunshine coming in through the windows. Castiel didn’t know about Gabriel but he was determined to soak it up and enjoy it while he could. “Maybe another hour or so for a hotel?” He ventured, trying to think about the map search he’d done before they’d set out this morning. Reedsville didn’t have any hotels that he could recall which meant they’d have to move onto the next town before bedding down for the night. “I don’t remember where the closest hotel is supposed to be but I know Reedsville doesn’t have one. It’s too small a town for that but there should be a gas station at least.” And hopefully a restaurant of some kind; Castiel didn’t know about his brother but he was getting hungry.

Gabriel grumbled something but it was too low to properly hear. Finally he shifted again, this time moving back into a proper sitting position. “Why are we going to such a small dump it doesn’t have a place to stay the night?” He whined, sounding far younger than he actually was.

“Because there’s possibly a spirit haunting a playground, or did you completely ignore the story I told you before we left?” There was an edge of hardness undercutting Castiel’s words; he didn’t like being ignored. He’d had a sneaking suspicion Gabriel hadn’t been listening when Castiel had relayed the tale to him over breakfast.

The sudden silence from the passenger seat was damning on its own and Castiel had to repress the growl that wanted to build in his throat because seriously? Would it kill Gabriel to pay attention for once in his life? He was gearing up to really let loose when he spotted the CITGO logo rising up over the greenery. “There’s a gas station.” He grumbled, at a crossroads between annoyed and wanting to just forget it.

Beside him Gabriel straightened and muttered something under his breath that might have been ‘oh thank god’ but since it was too low to properly hear, Castiel ignored him. The gas station was exactly what Cas expected to see out in the country like this; a small two-story building with apartments on the second story and an attached laundromat. He eyed that part curiously; they may have to swing back and visit it before leaving town.  _ Or at least Gabriel might... _ Castiel’s brain reminded him helpfully like he’d somehow forgotten he was on the down slide here.

Thankfully there were no lines at the pump and he was able to maneuver the car up to the pumps with no problems. As much as he liked his car Castiel knew it was a bit of a pain, especially trying to squeeze the boat of a car into small spaces, much like the gas station. He turned off the car and turned towards Gabriel with a grin...only to blink at the slam of the passenger door in his face. Then Castiel found himself grinning for a whole different reason as he watched Gabriel’s stiff gait as he hurried around the building to where the public bathrooms were. Still amused, Castiel got out of the car and went about getting ready to fill the tank. Things were still a bit strained and more than a bit awkward but he had a feeling everything would work out in the end. Considering he was very nearly down to his last twenty-four hours on Earth Castiel had to believe it. 

Nearly eight hours later Castiel was re-thinking his decision. Considering he and Gabriel were trying their best to tromp around a playground in the dark without tripping over anything it was hard to stay positive. Gabriel apparently shared the sentiment as he piped up from Castiel’s left: “Why are we doing this without flashlights again?”

Castiel rolled his eyes because there Gabriel went proving once again he didn’t listen to a damn thing he said. “Do you want the neighbors to see what we’re doing out here?” He hissed, remembering to keep his voice down at the last second. It’d just been their luck that the supposedly haunted playground they were checking out happened to be surrounded on all sides by houses. The places were less than a stone’s throw away and that knowledge had Castiel’s senses on high alert. Or was that the growling coming from the bushes over there? He started, squinting in the direction but he didn’t see anything. 

He had to repress a sigh; so far this whole trip had been something of a bust. None of the people in the surrounding houses had been willing to talk to a couple of guys from out of town and Castiel didn’t want to think what would happen if they caught them in the place under the cover of night. He didn’t like thinking it but it felt like this was the kind of town where ‘shoot first and ask questions later’ was a fitting descriptor. The rustling started again, distracting him, but this time when he turned Castiel nearly lept back in surprise: just peeking out of the bushes was a pair of glowing red, demonic looking eyes watching him.

“Holy shit!” Cas hissed, completely forgetting to keep his voice quiet as he backpedaled away from the bushes. The eyes watched his every move and it didn’t take a genius to figure out what was staring him down like he was on the dinner menu: a hell hound. All thoughts of the ghost hunt fled out of his head as Castiel continued backing away, keeping a wary eye on the ‘hound just in case. He had no idea what he’d do if it’d lunge, neither he nor Gabriel had come across anything that had been touted to actually kill one of the beasts.

“Cassie?” Gabriel’s familiar voice sounded right in his ear at the same time as Castiel backed right into something solid. There was an ‘oof!’ and the sounds of something hitting the ground but Castiel was too far gone for any of it. His throat closed up around a scream and all he could do was shake as fear overtook his senses. While the red eyes didn’t move it felt like they were coming closer, crowding into what little space Castiel had left and was that the hot breath of the beast washing over him? 

Gabriel had no idea what the hell was happening. As much as he’d considered it a bad idea he hadn’t been able to say no when Castiel had insisted on going on this ghost hunt. The last thing either of them needed was to be out hunting when it was so close to Castiel’s deal coming due but his little brother hadn’t been dissuaded. Gabriel both loved and hated him for it but right now he was fervently wishing he’d taken the high ground and insisted they skipped the case. Castiel had been off for most of the day, jumping at things that weren’t there and staring at others when he thought Gabriel wasn’t looking. It was disconcerting to say the least but Gabriel knew there was nothing he could do about it. He hadn’t told Castiel but he’d read the same books; he knew the damned often hallucinated in the hours before their deals came due. It made Gabriel’s guts churn as he watched it unfold and he couldn’t help but wonder what his brother was seeing. 

Though as he wrapped his arms around his suddenly shaking brother Gabriel had to concede that perhaps he really didn’t want to know. “It’s okay,” he whispered, suddenly grateful that none of the people in the surrounding houses had heard them; at least he didn’t think so. The houses he could easily see were still dark so Gabriel was willing to take it on faith they remained undetected for now. Besides, he had bigger fish to fry with the way his little brother was shaking like a leaf in his arms. He was also making strange little whimpering sounds that broke Gabriel’s heart to hear. “It’s okay little bro,” he murmured, wishing his voice was more soothing. “I’ve gotcha. If they want you they’ll have to come through me!”

For someone who was very shortly facing Hell itself Castiel felt cold. Like chilled to the very bones cold. He was mortified to find he was shaking from it as much as fear but he couldn’t find it in him to pull away. He had struggled in Gabriel’s hold at first until his rational brain had kicked in and told him who was holding him. Now he was simply thankful as he did his best to shake apart. Somewhere along the line he turned around to face his brother and had burrowed in, feeling like he was six years old again and Gabriel was his protector. He should have been mortified, breaking down like this, but fear was a powerful thing and for all the bravado Castiel had tried to cling to it was nothing more than smoke and mirrors. “I don’t want to die!” He finally whispered, voice as shaky as the rest of him. After a year it felt good to say, to give voice to the fear hanging over his head like a pendulum ready to fall. 

Gabriel clung on just as tight, unwilling to let his brother go any time soon. The position brought back memories from their childhood in which Gabriel had been the big brother, the protector. Castiel had been the youngest until Hannah had come along and Gabriel had adored his little brother.  _ How long has it been since I’ve held him like this?  _ He wondered, surprised to realize he didn’t know the answer. Somewhere along the line Gabriel had gone from being a protector to being a footnote in Castiel’s life; the realization was oddly humbling. Now that he had the opportunity back he wasn’t going to waste it. “I’ve gotcha.” He repeated, tightening his arms around his brother. He didn’t know what to say in the face of Castiel’s words, there was nothing okay about any of this. No amount of promise or platitudes would be able to make things better and the both of them knew it. 

They stayed like that for a time before Castiel finally pulled back. He didn’t go far, just enough to squint at his brother with a shaky facile of a smile. “So much for the ghost hunt.” He whispered, trying for levity and falling flat. His heart just wasn’t in it, and considering Gabriel had yet to let him go, his brother obviously felt the same.

Despite himself Gabriel snorted and shook his head. Leave it to Castiel to turn things back towards the hunt they were supposed to be having when they were having a moment instead. He drugged up a few chuckles from somewhere and shook his head again. “Maybe the ghost was enjoying the show?” He whispered back in reply, though he doubted it. Considering it was likely going on three a.m. and they hadn’t uncovered any evidence of a ghost it was likely the whole thing was a hoax. Oh, the joys of a small town rumor mill. “What do you say we get out of here?”

Castiel thought about protesting--they hadn’t finished the hunt after all--but why not? It was getting to be pretty obvious the hunt was already a bust, and besides that Castiel was tired. Suddenly the thought of curling up under a scratchy hotel blanket with a lumpy pillow that smelled funny sounded like heaven. It was ridiculous and Castiel knew Gabriel would give him shit for it if he mentioned it out loud but Castiel was beyond caring. It was his last night on Earth after all, shouldn’t he get to spend it the way he wanted? “Okay.” He agreed easily, letting Gabriel think he was going along with his idea after all.

“Excellent!” Gabriel beamed like he’d been given a million bucks and wasted no time in starting to lead them out of the park. “You know, some of those fast food places we passed on the way up here are open twenty four hours…” He rambled on as he led the two of them back towards the little gravel path that eventually opened into a parking lot.

Castiel just let his brother lead on; he was too tired to protest. It was like the fear had wiped all the energy out of his body in one fell swoop leaving nothing but a tired husk behind. Castiel surrendered to it, letting himself drift in the comforting normality of Gabriel’s rambling. He was nearly asleep by the time they reached the car and he found himself tucked into the passenger seat by comforting hands. By the time they were on the road heading back to their hotel Castiel was dead to the world, completely asleep.

Despite the circumstances Castiel managed to sleep the rest of the night through. It was nothing short of a miracle, Castiel sleepily mused when he woke the next morning. He hadn’t slept a decent night since making the deal, to have finally managed it in the end was strange to say the least. Like normal he’d woken with the sun though instead of getting up he opted to remain laying in bed. Across the room Gabriel slept on, oblivious to the rising dawn. He snored softly and for a time Castiel was content to lay there and simply listen to the sound. Peace filled the hotel room alongside the sunlight and for the first time in a year Castiel felt content. 

It was a shame it couldn’t last. Sadly for Castiel peace wasn’t on the menu for where he was going. The reminder of this arrived in dramatic fashion as the hotel door exploded off its hinges. Both hunters bolted upright in their beds but it was already too late: a strange woman came strolling in through the debris like she owned the place. She had light skin and dark hair just like the demon at the crossroads had, and Castiel felt his heart start to pound in his chest as her eyes flipped to inky black pits.  _ Oh God!  _ He thought, bile crawling up his throat. He wasn’t ready--he couldn’t do this--Couldn’t force himself to do anything but stare at the demon wide-eyed like everyone in the room didn’t already know exactly what it was doing there.

The sound of a gun cocking broke the silent standoff and rattled Castiel out of his momentary panic. He looked towards the sound unsurprising to find Gabriel standing between the beds in nothing more than his neon pink rubber ducky boxers, gun at the ready. “Get the fuck outta here!” He snarled for what little good it’d do. They both knew the gun wouldn’t be enough to kill the demon but Castiel was glad to see it nonetheless. At least one of them still had their wits about them! 

Whether it was the sight of Gabriel or the gun, either way the demon didn’t look impressed. She waved her hand, sending a pulse of invisible energy straight into Gabriel, which sent him flying backwards. The gun went one way and he went the other, slamming hard up against the far wall. He let out a groan as his head slumped forward, eyes fluttering shut.

“Gabriel!” Castiel called, scrambling to get out of his bed, but it was too late. Moving with an unnatural speed the woman appeared at the end of Castiel’s bed, looking down at him with unholy glee. “Castiel Novak!” She declared like she was meeting a celebrity for the first time. “I can honestly say I’ve been looking forward to this!” 

Castiel opened his mouth to retort, or possibly call for his brother again, but he couldn’t find words at the sight of the beast slinking through the broken doorway. It was larger, larger than any dog Castiel had laid eyes on and even from across the room it stank heavily of sulfur. The beast was made of black smoke and rotting flesh with a massive jaw that held more teeth than should have been possible. It sniffed the air curiously before turning that giant head in Castiel’s direction, it’s deep glowing red eyes locking with his.

He should run, Castiel knew, should run for his life and never stop but he was frozen with fear. He’d heard the term but he’d never felt so paralyzed before in all his life and no matter how much he wanted to he found he couldn’t look away from the hell hound. It was worse than any tales, way worse than any illustrations, and Castiel was sure he’d die from a heart attack just looking at it.

Sadly, he’d never get the chance. In one fluid motion the demon stepped back from the bed and flicked its wrist. Castiel never saw the beast move; one second it was there and the next it was on top of him, crushing him under its massive weight. He found his voice again to scream, the sound echoing off the walls as the hell hound tore into him, determined to take his soul. The sounds of screaming and the demon’s maniacal laughter followed him down into the darkness...


	6. Chapter VI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Art in this chapter is from Aggiedoll!

If there was one place in all the cosmos that angels generally feared to tread and wanted to be simultaneously it would have to be the throne room of heaven. It was an understandable dichotomy; God himself had once resided upon the throne, and if the older angels were to be believed, one could still sense him there. So needless to say when Dean found himself summoned to the throne room he had to wonder just what he’d done to warrant such a thing. 

As a general rule angels didn’t panic. They were built to receive orders and mindlessly obey, not to worry or fret or panic like their father’s creation did. Dean, on the other hand, had always been a bit different compared to his brethren. He obeyed and followed orders with the best of them but deep down in his being he had...questions. It was a sensation Dean lacked the words to describe, and the knowledge to properly question. Who was he to question things anyway? He was a mere foot soldier, programmed to obey and follow orders from his superiors...the same superiors who had summoned him to God’s throne room. 

That unusual spike of wrongness flooded through his being as he considered the long hallway before him. It was like any other hall in heaven: full of white light and multiple doors containing souls of the deceased except for the very end. There stood a massive white door that curved into a peak at the top and somehow managed to look imposing despite the fact it was simply a door. Had Dean been a lesser angel he would have turned and flown for it, risking whatever punishment would await him afterwards. Unfortunately Dean wasn’t the type to back down just because something seemed off to him. No, he was more of a keep going and punch his way through. Which is why, despite his reservations, he found himself heading towards that white door. 

Still, it wasn’t a fast approach. How could it be when Dean still wasn’t sure what he’d done to warrant such a call? You didn’t get summoned to the throne room for nothing; either you’d done something to warrant it, and that was bad enough, or something serious was about to go down. Dean wasn’t sure which scenario bothered him the most, though he was fairly sure the night he’d snuck out and spent watching the humans hadn’t been enough to get him summoned here. They were supposed to be the human’s protectors, weren’t they? Well you couldn’t do a job like that without checking on your charges every once in a while, right? As far as excuses went it was weak but considering he was seconds away from touching the door standing between him and the throne Dean would take it. At this point, why not? Excuse made, and stealing whatever reserves he had, Dean reached out and carefully knocked on the door.

Despite barely touching it the sounds of his gentle knocking echoed LOUDLY in the otherwise empty hallway, to which Dean cringed away. It was the wrong move; for seconds later the door swung soundlessly open, leaving him cringing in a swath of bright light emanating from the room beyond. Thankfully the light seemed to kick some kind of gear in line in Dean, causing him to straighten as he tried to see past the light. It was a good thing too as a voice boomed from within the room: “You’re late!”

Dean cringed again, though this time for an entirely different reason. Even still partially blinded by the light he knew that voice--John-- and it wasn’t one to be trifled with. John was one of the older angels and the leader of Dean’s current garrison. He had a reputation for ruling with an iron first and brooking no disobedience from those under his command. Dean hadn’t worked all that closely with him in the past, a good thing indeed since Dean seemed to have a knack for annoying him far more than anyone else. That he was here in the throne room waiting for Dean spelled disaster with a capital ‘D’, and not for the first time Dean found himself wishing he’d flown for it when he had the chance. 

“Don’t just stand here! Get in here, boy!” John’s thunderous voice boomed again, startling the younger angel out of his revelry. His tawny wings folded tightly against his back, a sure sign of submission, as he hastened to comply. To his surprise there was more than John in the room when he was in it far enough to properly see: there was also Bobby, an angel rumored to be older than John and possibly even an Eldest; and Mary, who was rumored to have been involved with John at some point before she came to her senses and was a fierce garrison commander in her own right.

Dean stared, shocked to see the three of them not only together but with grim looks painted on their faces as well. He could feel his wings twitch from where they were so tightly bound to his back, and had to wonder yet again what he could have possibly done. It was one thing to be summoned by your garrison commander, but it was a whole different thing to find yourself in the presence of so many older angels at once.

Bobby, thankfully, seemed to be taken in by Dean’s pole-axed expression. He smiled in what was probably supposed to be reassuring but managed to look more stilted than anything before saying: “You aren’t in trouble.”

It was little relief considering the way John was glaring, but Dean was willing to take it. He nodded, gaze traveling over all three of them before returning to Bobby again. “Okay...Why am I here?” 

From across the space Dean could hear John scoff, and he lowered his gaze to the floor. He’d barely been in here a few minutes and he was already messing things up! Rule number one was you don’t question your superiors, ever. Even a simple question like Dean’s could lead to full scale rebellion and after what had happened to the last angel who rebelled, well, Dean didn’t want to take the chance. 

He was silently condemning himself when Bobby spoke up again, his voice quieter but just as commanding as John’s: “Look at me son,” the older angel urged, and waited until Dean reluctantly did so. “I don’t care if you ask questions.” Bobby said, ignoring the noise of protest arising from behind him. “You’re here because there’s a special job that needs doing and you’re just the angel for it.”

Wait. What? Was he hearing that right? Dean simply blinked, dumbfounded and at a complete loss of words because, seriously? He was the right angel for some job? He found his head lifting on its own, his disbelieving stare swinging from one face to the other because surely this was a joke. Nobody, and he meant _nobody_ , had ever singled Dean out like this before. He was a foot soldier, good at following orders, nothing more.

Apparently the disbelief showed up loud and clear on his face because Bobby rolled his eyes, and tried his best to appear annoyed. It didn’t work, however, considering the way he was smirking like he knew something Dean didn’t. “I know what you’re thinkin’,” He started without a preamble, “but you are the right angel for this. You’re a good soldier, loyal to a fault, and follow the rules better than any of the others in your garrison.” The older angel leaned in, pulling all of Dean’s focus onto him. “This is a big job, son. Word is Hell’s got its claws into a human soul it shouldn’t have. We need you to go down and rescue him.”

Dean stared, brain flat-lined in complete and utter shock; there was no way he heard that right. They wanted him to lay siege to _Hell_ to rescue a human? The idea was so laughable Dean didn’t even know where to start! “You--you’re kidding!” He finally cried, eyes wide and disbelieving as he stared at Bobby. “I--You--Why me?”

“Because you’re the best,” Bobby said as though it was simple as that. “We all discussed it and you were the best choice for the job if you want to take it. There’ll probably be a promotion in the works for you afterwards.” Bobby went on as if his words were helping rather than sending Dean deeper towards full blown panic. “I know you’ve been wanting to make a garrison leader someday…”

This was...it was too much. Dean was beyond floored and he honestly didn’t know what to do about any of this. Bobby wasn’t wrong; becoming the leader of his own garrison of angels someday had been Dean’s dream for some time. But _Hell_ ? Hell was..Hell! It was full of smoke and brimstone and souls getting tortured in ways Dean couldn’t even _imagine_ and they wanted him to go there? Dean didn’t have the words to even begin a conversation about this, let alone be agreeable to going in the first place! And why him? What had he ever done to become the best angel for the job? There was no way, just no way this was happeni---

\---”Stop!” John’s voice was like a crack of thunder in the otherwise still room, echoing through it with a level of authority that only he could command. “What Bobby didn’t make clear is you’re going. There is no one else so don’t even think about it. You’ve been chosen and you WILL do this or else.”

Just like that Dean felt all his complaints shrivel up and die in his throat. Mouthing off to Bobby was one thing; standing up to John was a different one. Namely, he could get away with the one and not the other. Dean sighed, resigned, and hung his head. He didn’t want to do this but it seemed like he was getting absolutely no say in the matter. “Kay,” He finally muttered at length, defeated. He just hoped he would be able to survive…


	7. Chapter VII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter warning: Possibly unsettling depictions of Hell and of corpses.
> 
> Art in this chapter is by Aggiedoll

Hell was exactly like Dean’s worst nightmares and in the moment he didn’t know if he found the knowledge more horrifying or hilarious. Unlike the bright purifying light of Heaven, Hell was a dank, dark pit filled with fire and brimstone and clouded over with thick black smoke. All that was imposing enough, but what was worse was the screaming. The ghastly sound rang up from the depths and echoed off every available surface. It was beyond horrible and Dean could feel his seconds, Sam and Garth, trembling behind him. Dean didn’t blame them; if there had been any way to get out of this while saving face he would have already turned and fled for it. How were they supposed to lay siege to this? Much less do it successfully enough to rescue one damned soul? 

“Dean? Are you okay?” A voice asked from behind his right shoulder, successfully snapping Dean back into the present. He glanced over his shoulder to see Sam, his (arguably) favorite brother giving him a knowing look. Though Dean was technically older than Sam he’d never been able to hide anything from the younger angel. Generally it was an annoying trait, because who actively enjoyed hanging around someone who could read you like a book?, but right now he was grateful for it. Though there was absolutely nothing okay about any of this, Dean or otherwise, he mustered up a shaky grin. It wouldn’t do any good to break down now, and since none of them were getting out of here, the only way to go was through. “I’m fine.” He reassured his second even as he was grasping for courage he didn’t necessarily feel. He’d heard a human phrase once about ‘faking it ‘til you made it’ and while he was fairly sure it wasn’t for something as serious as laying siege to Hell, Dean clung to it. Who knew, maybe if he believed it long enough they could actually pull this insane idea off. 

Dean glanced left, past Garth and the other angels lined up behind him to find Mary’s garrison and her seconds, Jody and Donna, watching him. They were rewarded with the same shaky grin he’d given Sam before he looked away again. Bobby and his garrison were to the right of them, and Dean didn’t need to look to feel the judgemental gaze coming off of John. How they’d managed to talk him into stepping down for a job as big as this was beyond Dean. He was sure it hadn’t gotten down quietly, and was intimately glad he hadn’t been party to that decision.

Still, one couldn’t stall forever. With one last glance back Dean took in the reassuring looks of Sam and Garth before he turned back to the wasteland of the Pit before them. “Fake it ‘til you make it!” He muttered under his breath as he led the charge.

**-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-**

There was one thing they hadn’t taught Dean about fighting the forces of Hell: the demons fought dirty. It was probably thought to be a no-brainier considering where they were and what they were doing but Dean was still taken off guard anyway. The garrisons had barely breached Hell’s gate when countless demons met them, ready to fight to the death. To say it’d been bloody and brutal was a sheer understatement; Dean didn’t even know how many of his still lived. He wasn’t sure how it’d happened but he’d gotten separated from his garrison and was now fighting his way through Hell by his lonesome. _Were the rest of them okay? Were they still out there fighting?_ He wondered as he slashed and stabbed and clawed his way through demon after demon. There was no time to dwell on his brethren; as many demons Dean cut down that much more seemed to multiply before his eyes. All he could do was hope his garrison and the others were holding their own. As it was Dean was in danger of getting swarmed and he knew he couldn’t let that happen. Once it did he’d be as good as dead, and with nobody from his side anywhere in sight he knew he’d be truly on his own. The worst part of it was the demons wouldn’t kill him outright; oh no, Dean was certain there would be a considerable amount of torture done before they finally granted him the mercy of death. While the thought of being tortured made his very being quake, the upside was it kept Dean moving. 

Speaking of moving...what was it? There in the distance, partially obscured by the smoke shone a beautiful blue light. Even at a distance it was beyond stunning, so shining and pure, Dean barely felt able to witness it. What could possibly shine like that? He wondered as he continued through the fray. Surely it wasn’t...was it? Dean mulled over the possibility for a split second before he made up his mind; no matter what it was he had to check it out. He fought like an angel possessed, using his sword and wings to keep the vile bastards at bay as he struggled his way towards it. 

Without ever really realizing it the world for Dean narrowed down to that bright light. The cries and screams of the damned, the fire and smoke, the unrelenting demons, all of it slowly faded away. All that remained was the light; it flicked occasionally but it seemed to beckon to him in a way he couldn’t deny. Whatever it was it had a pull to it, a desperate need that hooked Dean like a tether that pulled him ever closer. He didn’t even realize he was nearly upon it until he was literally right there and the light was right there, close enough to touch.

Sweet heaven above! Dean was startled to find the light was not a light after all, but a soul. Up close the inside of the soul stood the ghostly outline of a young man with tousled hair and piercing eyes. It was a stark contrast to the twisted evil creature the soul was becoming on the outside. It was twisted into a shape no human could ever hope to achieve with burnt, black skin hanging loosely off it. The face was barely more than a twisted skull with pitch black eyes and matching horns protruding from above its temples. There was a bloody knife held tight in one of its clawed hands and Dean found himself horrified all over again. Against his will his eyes followed the path of the knife and he felt a sharp stab of something when it dangled above an equally bloody soul bound to a slab before the soul. Dean couldn’t help it; he backpedaled. This was the soul he was here for, there was no doubt about it, but he couldn’t help being scared of the creature in front of him. It wasn’t so much the demonic appearance of the soul; he’d expected that on some level, but nothing had prepared him for seeing just how far it’d become.

He’d been sent here to save this? This ruined and hideous soul that glowed so brightly Dean was sure all of heaven could witness it? The sensation of being caught between laughter and tears rose again and Dean honestly didn’t know which way he was going to fall. He suddenly, desperately, wished his garrison had made it this far. Sam would know what to do, what to say in the face of this. Why couldn’t they have sent Sam instead? 

Dean wished he had the answers, but he didn’t. He didn’t even have the time to ponder the questions; somehow when he wasn’t paying attention it was like a switch had been flicked to life around them. Demons were scaling the rocky terrain and Dean had little doubt that it was time to get out of here. Shoving his reservations aside, he didn’t even think: he grabbed the soul around what would have been the human’s waist, and hauled ass out of there. 

**-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-**

The second thing nobody told Dean was getting the soul out of Hell was the _easy_ part. Nobody had mentioned the fact that after they breached the gate separating Hell and Earth the soul was going to need a body. More specifically, Dean was going to have to craft one while holding onto the broken, bleeding soul that clung to him like a human child. That had been the most baffling thing; Dean had never interacted with humans outside of observing them and had no idea what he was supposed to do. For a lack of better idea he finally brought his wings up and around to carefully wrap around the soul. It seemed to be the right move, if the way the soul practically melted against the soft features of his wings were any indication. Dean smiled, despite himself, and quietly returned to the task of finding the soul’s earthly remains.

It took some searching but finally Dean found them--buried in a grave in the middle of a field in West Virginia. Between one blink and the next he and the soul had travelled there, the latter still cradled by his wings. It took little effort to exhume the pitiful grave, and Dean felt a stab of remorse that the beautiful soul hadn’t warranted something better. “I’m sorry, bud.” He told the soul, unsurprised for when it merely buried itself further into his wings. Hell aside, the poor thing seemed starved for affection and Dean was determined to do what he could while he still had the chance.

It took a little over a full day on Earth for Dean to transform the pile of bones and rotting flesh back into a fully functional human body, minus the soul. It had remained clung to him, seemingly oblivious to what Dean was doing. The angel hadn’t minded considering he didn’t know what the protocol was for taking care of souls. In the end he had decided to let it simply be beyond talking to it occasionally. By the time the body was ready for the soul Dean was grateful none of his brothers had shown up to witness this. Somewhere along the line he’d begun humming and had effectively rocked the soul in his wings like he was handling a human babe. Dean’s brethren would have something to say about the position for sure, and he did his best to shove it out of his mind as he slowly unfurled his wings from around the soul.

Out in the sunlight, away from all the horrors of Hell the soul still glowed like the brightest star Dean had seen. It was beyond beautiful, and something deep within him wanted nothing more than to protect it from harm. Not for the first time Dean had to wonder what the soul had done to entice him in so short of a time. It was mystifying but there would be time for reflection later, he was sure. Now it was time to put the soul back where it belonged.

“C’mon bud, it’s time to go home.” He murmured, surprisingly gentle as he reached down and scooped the soul up. The soul shook and shuddered under his hands, no doubt expecting hurt to come to it like what had happened so many times before. Dean shushed it, his hands gentle as he lowered it down towards the waiting body. He hoped he had done it justice; he’d used the soul’s memories to build the body correctly and he was fairly sure he’d gotten everything correct. At least he certainly hoped so; humans had some rather strange appendages that left the angel unsure. Still, no time like the present!

Still murmuring soft nothings, Dean carefully lowered the soul until it was laid out overtop it’s mortal body. “Sorry man, this is going to hurt..” He warned before he gave the soul a little shove. The light grew brighter in alarm as the soul sunk down into the body but Dean only smiled. The body jerked once, as if having a convulsion, and then began to breathe. “You’ll be okay,” Dean told it before turning away from the now living body. There was just one thing left to do.

He knelt at the edge of the open grave that he had pulled the soul’s body from and examined it for a long moment. He didn’t like this part but it had to be done according to the plan he’d been told before they had set off for Hell. With a snap of his fingers the dismantled wooden coffin snapped back together, perfectly whole at the bottom of the grave. Dean frowned at it, not liking one bit of what he had to do. Wouldn’t it be simpler for the human to wake with the open sky above him? The field they were in was beautiful by any of his father’s standards; a bright blue sky, a shining sky, barely a cloud in the sky. There were the sounds of birdsong and insects in the air; all in all it was perfectly peaceful. 

It was cold comfort, however, considering Dean had to bury the man back into the ground again. He found himself still frowning as he went back to the body and picked it up, pleased to find it warm to the touch and very much alive. “I’m sorry about this,” He offered in pity condolence as he lowered the man’s body back down into the awaiting box. The human didn’t even stir, to which Dean found himself utterly thankful. He didn’t want the poor guy to wake like this; it was bad enough he’d be doing so from inside the box. Unable to handle the slew of unfamiliar emotions churning through him, Dean stood and turned before snapping once more. He didn’t turn to look afterwards; he didn’t want to see the way the earth had returned to its previous state like there wasn’t a man six feet down waiting to wake. No, Dean had seen enough. His job now done; he unfurled his tawny wings and took flight. It was time to go home.


	8. Chapter VIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter warning: This chapter contains non-con and rape (off screen). Also contains depictions of being buried alive/Castiel digging his way out of his coffin.
> 
> Art in this chapter is by Aggiedoll

If anyone had asked Gabriel Novak where he planned to settle down one day he would have laughed that person in the face and declared he was never going to settle down. Boy, look at him now: it’d only been four months since Castiel had been killed to save his hide and yet Gabriel hadn’t moved on. Though truly, couldn’t move on was probably a better description. He’d never fancied himself a country man but four months of fresh air and sunlight and no hunting had done some wonders for him. Oh, Gabriel didn’t think it was going to last forever. He’d been in the hunting life for too long to know forever was a concept made up by people who didn’t live hand to mouth running credit card schemes just to keep themselves clothed and fed. It was also for those who weren’t currently living out of a Jubilee Gold 1978 Lincoln Continental Mark V. 

“If only Cassie could see me now!” Gabriel remarked to no one as he climbed over the front seat to settle in the driver’s seat. He’d all but ran out their pitiful stash of money in the first month, drinking it away like it’d be enough to free his brain of the memories. Unfortunately he’d found there wasn’t enough booze to bleach out the instant replay of Castiel being mauled to death by an invisible hound. Gabriel squirmed in the seat, barely repressing the shudder running up his spine. Four months on and still there mere thought made him want to pee his pants from sheer fear. “Jesus! Get ahold of yourself Gabe!” He muttered darkly as he brought a hand up to scrub through his hair. The strands were greasy and gross but that was what happened when you didn’t have access to things like bathrooms and showers. 

With a defeated sigh, he dropped his hand to rest on the steering wheel. All lack of current living situations aside, it’d been a long four months. Hell, it’d been a long _year_ plus _the four months._ Everything had gone to hell in a hand basket and the worst thing of it all was Gabriel didn’t have anyone except himself to blame for it. If he hadn’t gone to that club with Balthazar in the first place none of this would have even happened! 

The club... just thinking about it made Gabriel shudder and he swore the temperature in the car dropped several degrees. Despite there being half a country between there and here and a year to dull the memories Gabriel still remembered it all in sharp clarity. The bulked up bouncer with sharp pointed teeth that screamed ‘vampire!’; the buxom dark haired woman who knew what she was doing as she led him down a dark hallway; the sinister smile of the man in the white suit who’d shown up just as Gabriel orgasmed… Shame burned hot and fast down his neck as he unwillingly remembered the way the man had screamed about him raping his best girl and the unorthodox deal that had followed. Bile rose up his throat as he remembered the things the man had made him do, had _forced_ him to do. It’d been beyond humiliating and all Gabriel had wanted to do was die. Then came the torture and Gabriel was sure he was going to die...and then…

...Then he remembered waking up in that hotel room with no memory of how he’d gotten there. Remembered the way Bathazar’s face had crumpled as he cried in a way Gabriel had never seen from his stoic cousin before. And then there was Castiel, returning to the hotel after he’d gone and done the stupid thing by selling his soul to save a worthless piece of shit like Gabriel. Fury raced up his spine, revitalizing him. How could he have been so stupid? Gabriel had always known he was a piece of shit, but to have it constantly rubbed in his face for a year as Castiel’s time ticked down? And been unable to do a damn thing about it? It’d been beyond infuriating and he clung to the feeling now, letting it chase away the cold chill. “You stupid son of a bitch!” He choked out, knowing his brother couldn’t hear him. A few more choked breathes followed but by then Gabriel was unsurprised to realize he was crying.

**-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-**

For a time after the angel left nothing of import happened in that idyllic field. The breeze blew, gently swaying the grass in its wake as woodland creatures roamed to their content. Truly it was like any other day...right up until it wasn’t.

After a veritable lifetime of hunting one would expect Castiel to be used to waking in strange places with little memory of how he’d gotten there. While that was the case normally Castiel was fairly sure waking up to pitch blackness was a new experience even by his standards. “What the?” He muttered as he brought a hand up to rub at his eyes...only to hit it upon a hard surface before he could even get there. What the hell? He palmed the surface, shocked to discover it felt like wood. What was going on here? Dropping his hand he squirmed around the best he could, his confusion only mounting when he encountered the wooden surface on all sides. What _was_ this? It took some skilled maneuvering but eventually he managed to pull a lighter out of his pocket. 

A practiced flick of the wheel and Castiel’s confusion only deepened. Through the dim, flickering light he was able to see he was indeed ensconced in wood at all sides, and if he didn’t know any better he’d swear it was a coffin...but that was impossible, right? A cold creeping sensation moved up his spine as he scanned his memory for knowledge of how he’d gotten here, only to fall short. Wherever he was he didn’t remember getting there which meant… Castiel couldn’t even think about it. He became a man enraged, kicking and screaming and clawing at the wood like a wild animal. He thrashed and tossed the best he could in his confinement until he finally hit pay dirt, literally. 

Dirt poured in from a jagged hole the size of Castiel’s hand near his head, surprising him. He didn’t know what he had been expecting to find on the other side of this wooden box but dirt wasn’t it. Still, he wasn't about to give up. It was an awkward angle but he thrust both his hands into the hole, ignoring the way the sharp edges dug into his skin, and pulled. 

….And pulled

….And pulled

...Until suddenly there was a sharp *CRACK!* that echoed loudly throughout the small box. It made Castiel’s ears ring and he was sure his hands were bleeding but he hardly cared because his work had paid off: the hole had grown bigger and dirt was pouring in more and more. Castiel didn’t know what lay on the other side but surely it had to be better than the situation he was currently stuck in. He didn’t need to think twice: he reached up and began to dig.

A lifetime passed but Castiel didn’t let it slow him down. It took nothing short of an eternity to pull himself fully from the box but there was still dirt all around and no time to rest. He dug and clawed and fought his way for every foot until finally, at long last, his reaching fingers encountered nothing but air.

Elation at breaking the surface swept through Castiel so fast his head spun. After spending who knows how long in the stifling confinement of the box and the equally suffocating weight of the dirt, all Castiel wanted was to be free. Taking as deep a breath as he could, he summoned up the last of his strength and pushed his way towards the surface. It paid off; the sweet smell of air brushing against his overheated skin was more wonderful than words could describe. He was so close! He pushed and pulled and finally, finally he pulled himself out. On shaking arms and equally shaking knees he crawled a few paces away before he finally collapsed, exhausted.

For a time he simply lay there, panting as he struggled to catch his breath in the early evening breeze. He’d gotten enough of a look at his surroundings to know he was in a field but the ‘why’ and the ‘how’ of it all was the furthest thing from his mind at the moment. It was a silly, naive thing, but he was strangely proud of himself. He’d gotten himself free; but now what? The question lingered as he caught his breath, his desperate panting slowing to something approaching normal. 

Everything felt like some kind of dream, he pondered as he continued to lay there and watch the clouds go by. _Yeah a terrible nightmare full of torture and pain!_ His inner voice taunted to which Castiel shuddered. Unlike the dream-like quality to the world around him he remembered Hell perfectly. The screams, the pain, the promise of relief if he’d only listen for the first time in his life… Castiel shuddered again, distraught, and was horrified to fill the tell-tale feel of tears burning in his eyes. Gabriel would tease the heck out of him, he thought, as he blinked rapidly in a last ditch effort to delay the inevitable. Though on second thought, when the horrendous images didn’t fade from behind his eyes, Castiel wondered if his brother actually would tease him. For all his faults Gabriel wasn’t one to kick a man when he was down, and at the moment Castiel considered himself pretty far down. 

_I guess I’ll find out…_ Castiel thought darkly when he was sure he finally had himself under control. Despite his mixed feelings otherwise he knew he needed to get up and try to start looking for his wayward brother. Or well, at least a phone at the very least considering he literally had no idea where he even was in the first place. _Then_ he’d see about finding Gabriel. As Castiel made his way back to standing again he had to wonder what Gabriel would think about the situation Castiel was now in. He’d been in Hell...and now he wasn’t. That alone came with an entire barge full of questions, but the main one that kept circling through Castiel’s mind was _why_ ? It wasn’t that he didn’t appreciate being tossed out of Hell, but why had they let him loose? Neither he nor Gabriel had found anything in their feverish searching on demon contracts hinted at anyone coming _back_ from the Pit. Not human, at least… Castiel shook his head, stalling that line of thought right there. 

Somewhere along the line of his thoughts he’d picked a direction at random and began walking, oblivious to the world around him. How long had he been gone? Was the next thought to pop up and the realization that it could have been a decade or more made Castiel freeze in his tracks. What if too much time had passed and Gabriel was old and grey now, living out the rest of his life in a nursing home somewhere? Or, what if Gabriel had gotten jumped on a hunt since Castiel hadn’t been there to watch his back and he was dead now? The thought made Castiel run cold as he realized how very screwed he’d be if Gabriel was indeed dead. He currently had nothing in his name; no wallet, though the credit cards inside it were probably expired anyway, and no clothes beyond the ones currently on his back. That had him looking down at himself, frowning at the dirt covered jeans and white shirt he was wearing. There was no blood, he noted absently, which meant Gabriel had redressed him before planting him. The thought bothered him more than he thought it should’ve as he stood there shivering in the warm evening air.

Eventually he found the will to move once more. No matter the state of his brother, either alive or dead, Castiel couldn’t feasibly stand in the middle of a field all night long. So he continued on, his head feeling like it was stuffed full of cotton thanks to all the thoughts racing circles through it. As the sunlight gradually slipped away to night he thought he saw lights in the distance to which he breathed a sigh of relief. With any luck he wouldn’t have to spend the night in the field after all. 

**-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-**

Dean had expected many things when he returned to heaven but the round of applause that broke out when he strolled through the gates hadn’t been one. He stopped, shocked, as members of his garrison flocked around him with excited faces and wide eyes. Unsure of why he was suddenly the center of so much attention Dean looked up, searching out Sam and Garth’s faces amongst the sea of excited angels. When he finally spotted them he struggled his way through the crowd, still bewildered to what exactly was going on here. “What is all this?” He asked when he was close enough, surprised at how many angels were actually there.

Both Sam and Garth had been smiling as they watched Dean reach them but upon hearing his question their smiles fell. The two shared a look before Sam finally took pity and turned to Dean with a frown. “You don’t know?” He asked, sounding as confused as Dean was! 

“Know what?” Dean echoed, hackles raised. “Was there an invasion or something?” Surely that could be the only explanation for why the entire garrison was crowding around looking at Dean like he’d hung the moon.

Sam and Garth shared another one of those looks, though this time Garth decided to be the one to pipe up: “...There wasn’t any invasion Dean! You’re a hero man!” The younger, gangly angel smiled at him like that summed everything up perfectly.

What in the name of their Father had gone on here while Dean had been gone? Had everyone lost their minds? Dean floundered, feeling distinctly like a fish out of water as he squinted between Garth and Sam, trying to figure out what their game was here. “A hero.” He echoed flatly, eyes still flickering between the other two, “Why? I didn’t do anything!” Dean hadn’t realized his voice was growing louder by the end there but he certainly realized it when all the excited chatter from his garrison abruptly dropped off. It didn’t take a genius to feel all the eyes upon him and Dean found himself swallowing hard in response. Still he limited himself to focusing on Garth and Sam because out of everyone they were the two he trusted the most to have his back with whatever this was.

“Dean…” Sam started hesitantly, just as aware of all the other angels watching like Dean was. “Did you forget what happened in Hell? You saved the human! The chosen one! Garth’s right man, you’re a hero!” 

“You’re kidding.” While it wasn’t the best comeback ever it was literally the only thing Dean could come up with in the moment because, seriously? All this because he’d done the job given to him? He was beyond baffled; nothing even remotely like this happened for doing a good job so what was up? He felt a bit like a fish stuck out of water if all the floundering he was doing was any indication. He looked around at the crowd with new eyes and when he saw John lurking towards the back with a raised brow Dean abruptly hit his limits. He needed to get out of there, just to clear his mind if nothing else. Casting an apologetic look at Sam then Garth--he’d explain things to them later--he shoved his way through the crowd and quite literally flew for it.

It was a cowardly move, Dean thought as he drifted back towards the Earth, but he couldn’t be roused to care. Doing a job well that he hadn’t particularly wanted in the first place was one thing but the reception he’d just gotten was absurd. So he’d saved a human, so what? It wasn’t like it changed anything, at least nothing Dean could see. Despite that Dean found himself flying back to the area where he’d buried the human. He hadn’t intended to return but since going back home wasn’t an option at the moment, why not?

It was dark by the time he reached the field but Dean paid it no mind. He could see perfectly well in the dark and ths had no problems seeing the large hole in the ground where he’d buried the human. _Huh._ He thought, a smile involuntarily stretching across his face. It just seemed his luck; he’d come to check on the human but the human was clearly already gone. Shrugging his wings out behind him, Dean observed the field around him for a long moment. It didn’t take long to find what he’d been looking for; there, at the very edge of the field near a human settlement shone the bright blue soul Dean had raised from Hell. Pleased to find the human still so close the angel spread his wings and flew after him. Maybe spending some more time with the human would help things make sense; if nothing else it certainly couldn’t hurt, could it?


	9. Chapter IX

Castiel didn’t know whether to curse his luck or simply laugh hysterically. He had indeed seen lights but instead of coming upon a house like he’d expected he found himself staring at the front of a small line of four stores all housed together in one great white building. The security lights along the edge of the building allowed Castiel to see inside the darkened shops and his heart sunk through to his toes at the realization that they were closed. Now what was he supposed to do? He circled the buildings as he thought, taking the time to peer in the darkened windows. 

The building on the end was a craft shop of some kind with a wild array of quilts and wooden carvings adorning the walls across from the window. Dismissing that one, Castiel moved on, surprised to find a barber shop located in the next building. It seemed like a strange place to find one, out in the virtual middle of nowhere like this, but he shrugged and moved on. The next building was the largest and the only thing Castiel could see through the windows was a large open room. There was nothing to indicate what it could be used for and so he dismissed it like the others and moved to the fourth, and last building.

Unlike the others this one was a convenience store of some sort and Castiel swallowed hard at the sight of the coolers along the back walls and the shelves stuffed full of snack foods. He hadn’t realized how hungry and thirsty he’d been until he found himself staring sustenance in the face and suddenly it was all he could think about. His guts churned in anticipation as he straightened up and eyed the doors and windows with a professional eye. There were security cameras, but nothing to indicate an actual full blown alarm system and that was all the reasoning Castiel needed. Going back to the doors he eyed the window set above the handle for a split-second before suddenly driving his first through it. The pain and the noises of the glass breaking barely registered to Castiel; he was just too damned happy that his hunch about no alarms had been correct. There had been no sounds beyond what he’d made, and pleased, he maneuvered around until he was able to unlock and open the door.

Once inside he didn’t hesitate; bee-lining for the drink coolers in the back. There were bottles of every soft drink available alongside some beer but Castiel only had eyes for the bottled water. He nearly tore the door handle off in his haste to get to his prize and barely had the cap off the top of it before he was sucking it down greedily. Nothing, and he meant  _ nothing,  _ tasted as good as that bottle of water did. Castiel was sure he would have moaned from the sheer pleasure of it had his mouth not been otherwise occupied. He was almost disappointed when the bottle was empty and reached for a second without thinking about it. This one he drank a tad slower, but only just. 

When the second bottle was gone he finally came up for air and took a proper look around the shop. From first glance it seemed to be a cross between a small convenience store and a tourist trap with everything from a small clothing selection to toiletries to snacks and drinks. There was a newspaper stand by the door he hadn’t noticed when he entered and Castiel stopped to look, only to freeze when he saw the date on the top paper. September 30, 2019. Castiel stared, disbelieving, until the date began to blur in front of his eyes. Four months. It had only been four damn months since his deal had come due despite the fact it’d seemed an eternity longer down in the Pit. Castiel had expected to have been gone for years not, not months! Bile rose swiftly up his throat, and with a wild glance around, Castiel ran for the nearest bathroom. He slammed through the door and threw himself in front of the toilet just in time to hurl up the water he’d downed.

**-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-**

Dean observed the human with a frown, wondering what had happened to it. He had watched, invisible, as the human had gone from one building to the next until it finally broke into the last one. He had watched, spellbound as the human drank, sure he’d never seen anything like it before. What was it about this human that was so captivating? It’s soul was certainly a beautiful draw, Dean could admit. While his time with humans had been limited thus far he could honestly say he’d never come across a soul as beautiful as this one. He could still see it, even now, shining like a bright beacon that drew him in like a moth to a flame. Dean frowned as he considered what he was supposed to do now. Part of him wanted to return to heaven and forget all about the human but the other part, the more vocal part, kept him rooted in place. He couldn’t begin to explain why but there was just something about the human that compelled him to stay and watch. It was confounding, irritating, and---wait. Where was the human going? Dean’s frown only grew as he watched the human turn white and flee further into the building with a look of terror on its face. 

What had brought that on? Dean wondered, unconsciously moving closer to the building to see if he could glimpse the human. The frown deepened into a scowl when he realized he couldn’t see the human anymore, though there was an ajar door at the back that pointed out where it was likely hiding. Now what?  _ I should just scrub my hands of this and leave right now.  _ Dean rationalized. It’d be the smart thing to do, yet he couldn’t. It was maddening, the way the human had somehow wormed its way into Dean’s head. He was going to regret this, he was sure, but before he could talk himself out of it he called out: “Hey! Are you okay in there?”

Castiel was losing his mind, to be sure. He had puked until nothing else had come up only to slump over beside the toilet, exhausted by the effort. His head was spinning; this whole situation was fucked six ways to Sunday and he didn’t have a clue what to do about it. The newspaper he’d unwittingly brought with him crinkled as his hand tightened around it, causing his attention. A glance down revealed Castiel wasn’t as crazy as he seemed; the date still said September 30th.  _ Jesus!  _ He thought as he brought his free hand up to rub at his suddenly aching forehead. How had this happened? He had been so  _ sure  _ years had passed since his death but it was hard to argue with the truth right there in black and white. To make everything even more surreal Castiel had been startled to find he was still in West Virginia to boot. He had thought Gabriel would have taken him home to bury him, and the fact that he had chosen a field at random stung more than Castiel was willing to admit. It did boost his hope, however, that perhaps his brother was still out there somewhere close. Knowing him, it was likely Gabriel had found a place nearby to hole up for a while, or at least Castiel hoped so. 

Still, the whole thing made his head spin unpleasantly. He considered getting up and seeing if the store had aspirin when a loud, high pitched ringing noise assaulted his ears. “What the fuck!?” He wailed, though the words were lost under the terrible sound. He clapped both hands to his ears and curled up, trying his best to shrink away from it. What in the name of heaven and hell  _ was  _ that sound?! 

Was it common for humans not to answer when they were summoned? Dean was back to frowning as he watched the little building in front of him, but despite his calling the human hadn’t answered. It hadn’t come out of the little room it’d been hiding in either, which was purely annoying. “HEY!” He called again, wondering if perhaps the human simply hadn’t heard him the first time? “Hey! You in there! I’m talking to you!”

The sound stopped for the briefest of moments but Castiel’s ears still rang with it. He breathed out, and slowly started relaxing when all of a sudden it started up again. He shrieked and shuddered and wondered if it was going to cause him to go deaf. Despite a lifetime of hunting and a tour through Hell nothing compared to the biting pain of the ringing. “Please stop!” He pleaded, terrified beyond words.

Minutes passed, but still, nothing. Dean sighed, finally feeling defeated as he eyed the small door that hid the human from him. He didn’t know why the human didn’t reply to him...though as he considered it, perhaps the human couldn’t hear him? Dean had heard tales of humans who could only communicate with angels through a human vessel. Considering he hadn’t gotten any response in return it was plausible to say that this human was one of them. _Hmmm._

Taking a vessel wasn’t something Dean had ever thought of but it seemed like it was a day to do things he’d never done before. He’d already left heaven and followed the human this far, why not go a little further? Besides, what was the worst that could happen? Surely meeting and getting to talk to the human would be worth it. If nothing else then surely it could help Dean figure out why in the name of heaven he was becoming so attached to the human. Mind made up, Dean gave the door one last glance--still nothing--before reluctantly spreading his wings and taking flight. Hopefully he’d be able to figure things out soon.

Just when he was sure his ears were going to bleed the horrendous noise thankfully stopped again. Castiel let out a long exhale of relief, but he kept his hands up over his ears, just in case. It’d started back up once before, why was to say it wouldn’t do the same again? When minutes continued to tick by with nothing else happening he slowly lowered them and glanced around the bathroom. There was nothing to see, and more thankfully, nothing to hear. The world was just as quiet as it’d been before the sound started. Castiel slumped backwards into the wall, biting back the sudden laughter that wanted to bubble up in his chest. You couldn’t make this shit up, he thought ruefully, feeling delirious. 

“Why me?” He finally choked out when he felt like he could do so without laughing hysterically. Predictably there was no answer, not that there was anyone there to give one in the first place. “Story of my life.” Castiel muttered, uncaring of the fact he was sitting there talking to himself. Why would it matter anyway? It wasn’t like anyone was there to judge, and besides considering what he’d been through he felt more than entitled. At this point it was nothing short of a miracle that he wasn’t bug fuck nuts! Despite himself a couple of crazy sounding chuckles slipped through before Castiel could stop them.  _ Ah well!  _ He thought as his eyes slid closed of their own accord. Now that the initial shock and adrenaline rush of everything was over he was starting to crash, hard. Perhaps it’d do him good to rest here for a little bit before moving on. As long as he woke up before people showed up to open the place for the day all would be well…

Vessels, as it turned out, were  _ weird.  _ Oh, sure, the guy whose body Dean was riding around in had been pretty cool about the whole thing but Dean still found it unnecessarily strange. He felt like he’d been squished into a suit that was two sizes too small with a helmet that barely fit. Then there were just so many sensations and feelings and that wasn’t even taking into account the guy who was hanging around in the back of Dean’s borrowed head!  _ Why am I doing this again?  _ Dean wondered as he squirmed this way then that as he struggled to adjust to the vessel. He flexed the hands, stomped the feet, and jumped a good foot and a half when the voice in his head began laughing at him. “New to this, ain’t ‘cha?” The voice jeered, sounding surprisingly upbeat for someone who’d just given his body to an angel to cruise around in. “Just relax, would ya? You’ll get used to it.”

“Easy for you to say!” Dean grumbled back, uncaring of the fact that he was essentially arguing with ‘himself’. Still, he tried to take the guy’s advice and relax. It wasn’t easy when he felt like he was being squeezed on all sides but he had to admit when he tried the sensation lessened somewhat. Finally, though, Dean was ready to take the body on a real test spin--and if he ended up going past where the human he’d saved was then that was his business and nobody else’s. With a manic grin spreading across his borrowed face he spread his wings wide and they flew.

Flying with a vessel, as it turned out, was just as awkward and weird as Dean expected it to be. The vessel weighed him down where there hadn’t been weight before and the feeling was just an over encompassing feeling of wrongness. He’d get used to it eventually, Dean knew, but until then he couldn’t help wiggling around when he landed like a kid who had ants in their pants. Thankfully he’d gotten back to the spot where he’d left the human before the sun had even risen. It was all kinds of foolish but Dean found he was excited to see the human now through this limited vision and hearing of his vessel’s. He was going to be able to communicate with the guy now and that, more than anything, excited him. He didn’t have any idea of what he was going to say but that didn’t overly matter; he’d simply make it up as he went along.

Castiel had slept about as well as one could curled up on a hard unforgiving floor of a bathroom. Which to say, was terrible. He’d slept in fits and starts, waking just before dawn with a scream strangled in his throat. He straightened up with a shudder, eyes darting around the darkened bathroom like he expected something to jump out to attack him. The horrible images from his nightmares played along the walls every time he blinked and Castiel sucked in a sharp sob. It was slowly sinking in that although he may have gotten out he’d never be free; the memories would haunt him forever. 

He didn’t know how long he sat there, crying in the dark all alone, but eventually the sharp rumbling hunger from his stomach encouraged Castiel to move. He stood and cleaned up the best he could in the dark with the sink before stumbling out into the main room once more. He was, unsurprisingly, stiff and achy as he wandered through the small shop. It had been so long since he had actually eaten anything Castiel found himself feeling like an alien observer as he eyed the line of snacks stuffing the shelves. There was a little of everything: snack cakes, potato chips, various packets of seeds and nuts, and jerky in every flavor imaginable. Castiel reached out, his fingers lightly trailing over the assortment of brightly colored packages as he considered. Despite the hunger he felt nothing looked overly appetizing, he was surprised to note.  _ How far I’ve fallen…  _ He thought sullenly, his mind as dark as his nightmares. A few months spent down in the Pit and now he couldn’t do something as simple as picking out something to eat? Gods, he was pathetic! What was Gabriel going to think when they finally met up again? Castiel had spent the night wondering just that; would his older brother find him just as sad and pathetic as he now did? 

Finally he turned away from the display with a snarl, disgusted at himself. His eyes swept the store, taking things in without really seeing them when movement outside the window made him freeze. Was there someone out there? Or had Castiel’s nightmares actually come to life? In retrospect he didn’t know which thought was scarier, but he didn’t have time to ponder it now, right now all his brain power was focused on the looping thought of ‘what do I do?” as a lifetime of hunting knowledge flew right out of his head. Maybe he really  _ was  _ pathetic; he was certainly doing a good job of proving it, shrinking away from shadows like a frightened child. It was a sobering thought, and Castiel had to concede that if Gabriel had been here to witness it he surely would be laughing his ass off. Surprisingly, picturing his brother’s scorn helped. Castiel felt himself stiffen, though this time it was from anger rather than fear. He wasn’t weak; he’d just went through unspeakable torture and had come out on the other side. While it wasn’t something Castiel could claim as a strength it wasn’t nothing to scoff at either, at least in his mind. 

...Which also meant Castiel was about to do the stupid thing and confront whatever it was lurking outside. A voice that sounded suspiciously like Gabriel’s sighed in his head because some lessons were never learned, no matter how many times they were taught. Casting about the store with a newfound determination in his eyes, Castiel's gaze roamed over everything from a barrel of fresh apples to the small assortment of canned goods before he finally landed on the small section of camping gear tucked in the corner.

While it was a far cry from the weapons Castiel had kept stored in his car beggars couldn’t be choosers here. Keeping a wary eye on the windows Castiel slipped towards the corner to find something that could be useful. While not overly large the section seemed to have everything one would need for a camping trip from popup tents to fishing poles to lanterns and everything in between. Castiel took note of the tents--if he survived whatever this was he was definitely coming back for one of them--before turning his attention to the rest of the stuff. The fishing poles were out simply for being too flimsy but what was that, there in the back? He reached in towards the back of the display and could barely repress the smirk that tugged on his lips as he hefted a large cast iron pie iron out. It was the best thing he could hope for; large and heavily weighted. It wasn’t as good as say, a gun, but hopefully it’d be enough to deter whatever it was lurking out there in the dark. 


	10. Chapter X

It was unbecoming of an angel but Dean couldn't suppress the strange thrill that shot down his vessel's spine as he avidly watched the building where the human was hiding. He was excited, he realized, to see what the human would look like through the lens of his vessel. The idea seemed significant despite the fact Dean would virtually be seeing the man the same way either way. He was a tad disappointed that the human wasn't immediately visible but he found he was content to wait. As he watched he cast his thoughts out, brow furrowing as he marveled at the plethora of confusing feelings running through him. 

“Wow.. you sure are messed up man,” the voice of his vessel’s soul piped up from the back of his head. “You’ve got it bad for this dude. Who is he?”

Dean blinked, taken aback. He’d nearly forgotten already that he wasn’t alone inside the vessel and the reminder was a surprising relief. Not being alone meant he had someone to talk with about all of this! Still, there were a few misconceptions that needed fixed first… “I do not ‘have it bad’ for him!” He defended, shocked by the surge of strange feeling that accompanied his words. “I raised him from Hell. I’m merely glad to see him again!”

“Whatever helps you sleep at night dude,” the vessel snorted, amusement clear in his tone. “For someone who’s not completely gone you sure are defensive about it! It’s okay, you know? It’s not like I’m going to judge!” The guy chuckled, clearly amused by it all. 

“I don’t sleep.” Dean refuted, though he was clearly confused. What did sleeping have to do with him looking forward to seeing the human again? He mulled it over rather than replying because what else was there to say? Thankfully he was saved from having to come up with anything when a flash of something moving inside the building caught his eye.

It was his human, Dean was pleased to note, as he watched the man move about the building. He’d done a good job rebuilding the human’s body, Dean thought, as he watched the human search for something among the shelving set up in the building. He moved through the building with a grace Dean envied compared to the clunky way he moved in his borrowed vessel. The best part, however, was the way the human’s soul still shined out like the brightest blue beacon Dean had ever laid his eyes upon. It still shone so brightly it completely over shone the beauty of the body Dean had carefully crafted. The sight made Dean smile despite himself, because why not? There was nothing wrong with being proud of something you’d created with your own two hands…

“Yep, you’ve got it baaaad.” The voice of his vessel drawled, its natural southern accent ringing pleasantly around Dean’s skull. “I can’t say I blame you though, he’s a looker. What’s his name?”

Dean rolled his eyes, and oh that was  _ weird  _ in a vessel! Still he answered without quite thinking: “Castiel.” The angel said, voice soft and reverent, his focus still upon the human in the shop. “His name is Castiel.”

“Seriously?” The voice in his head sounded so full of disbelief Dean found himself pulling back from the window with a frown. “Got a thing for unusual names?” This time it chuckled like it was part of a joke that had gone over Dean’s head.

“What?” Dean finally asked at length, his curiosity gone in the face of all this confusion. He blinked, torn between pitting his attention inward and keeping an eye upon his human. “I don’t understand what you speak of.”

The voice of his vessel was so quiet for so long Dean figured it wasn’t going to respond when it finally surfaced with a curt “Never mind.” The angel found himself thoroughly baffled; just what had gone on here? Luckily he didn’t have time to explore it further because inside the building the human--Castiel--was on the move. The angel watched, intrigued, as Castiel abandoned the rows of shelves he had been poking around to head to the back of the building. What was he doing back there? Dean moved closer to the windows, despite him, curious as he watched. It hardly helped; he was equally baffled as Castiel pulled a strange long contraption from the cluster of items. What the human was planning to do with that the angel didn’t know, but the expression on his face when he turned back to the door left a shiver running up Dean’s borrowed spine. 

There was nothing friendly in the look upon the human’s face as he crossed the room to the door yet Dean couldn’t tear his eyes away from him. To him it looked like the human was going to come outside and to have Castiel within range to actually talk to him was exciting. At least, Dean thought it was exciting. He’d never actually spoken to a human before but since this was the one he’d rescued he was confident that it would go well. How hard could it be, after all? He bounced on his toes in anticipation, and boy that was yet another weird but pleasant thing, as he backed away from the window. 

**-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-**

Castiel clenched his jaw as he adjusted his sweaty grip upon the handles of the pie iron. He’d given in and glanced at the windows in front of the shop, only to immediately regret it. That thing out there was watching him. He’d suspected as much but the confirmation made the hair on the back of his arms and neck stand up in anticipation and fear. From a distance it almost appeared to be a human but deep down Castiel knew it couldn’t be. For one, there was no way a normal human would be able to see into the store the way the thing was. And for two he’d never seen any human stand that tall and straight before; it was almost like it had an iron bar for a spine instead of a human one made of bone. Either way, Castiel was  _ not  _ looking forward to this. While there weren't a lot of monsters out there that could take on a human form there was enough of them to make Castiel’s skin crawl and the knowledge that he was ill equipped to fight one made his stomach twist. The weight and length of the pie iron was better than nothing but he knew if push came to shove he’d be hopelessly out of luck. Oh, what he’d do to have his pistol and his knives on him!

Still, there was no time like the present: he shoved all his doubts and worries down as he stalked towards the door. He tightened his grip on the iron as he shoved his face into something approaching neutral and hoped he looked like the deadly hunter he’d been once upon a time. Fake it ‘til you make it had been a saying of Gabriel’s and well, what other choice did Castiel have? He just hoped the monster, whatever it was, wouldn’t kill him. As much as it’d undoubtedly suck to be injured he had no desire to go back to Hell so soon after escaping it. Taking a deep breath he pushed open the door and headed out into the night. 

Dean was practically vibrating with excitement as the human stepped outside. It was an effort to restrain himself but he somehow managed to contain himself to simply ruffling his wings in pleasure. As the human turned and regarded him fully Dean couldn’t help the slow smile that spread over his vessel’s face. What was it that humans said when they greeted one another? Ah, that was right-- “Hello Castiel!” The angel said, pleased that he had remembered. 

If the angel was expecting a civil reply in return he was about to be sorely disappointed. The hard look in the hunter’s eyes at being addressed by his name hardened even further and without comment Castiel swung the pie iron like he was swinging for the fences. The heavy weight made it swing hard and fast and before Dean could so much as twitch the cast iron square struck him sharply alongside the face. Dean’s head jerked with the movement but he was hardly phased as he turned his head back to look at Castiel.

Holy shit! This wasn’t happening! Castiel nearly dropped the iron in his shock; this wasn’t possible! A hit like that should have knocked the monster to the ground--even as he watched the side of its human looking face was starting to swell and the word LODGE was easily visible upon the reddening skin. Instead he found himself being stared at by a pair of the greenest eyes he’d ever seen and if Castiel didn’t know any better he’d say they were staring clear through to his soul. He swallowed hard, his grip on the iron faltering as he stared at those eyes. “The hell?” He finally muttered at length as he adjusted his grip on the pie iron and went in for a second swing.

Dean was ready for him this time; he reached out and caught the iron in mid-swing before it could get close enough to hit him again. “What’s the matter?” He asked, genuinely confused that this wasn’t going the way he had expected it. “Are you not pleased to be free from the Pit?” Or had Dean perhaps done something wrong when he rebuilt the human’s body? Maybe that was why he was reacting the way he was?

“Am I...I….” Castiel gaped, full on struck deaf and dumb at what was happening here. His fingers suddenly felt numb around the handles of the pie iron as he stared at the way the monster casually held it like it was nothing. Then on top of that the question it asked had completely thrown Castiel for a loop! What did it matter to this monster if he was pleased to be out of Hell or not? He was, because seriously who wouldn’t be, but what did this monster have to do with it? “It’s none of your business!” Castiel spat, some ire returning as he seethed. 

Dean blinked, flummoxed. This wasn’t going how he planned  _ at all  _ and for the life of him he didn't know how to fix it. It wasn’t like there was a guide out there on how to talk to the human you saved from the Pit and rebuilt, though considering how awkward things currently were there should’ve been. Maybe he’d gone about this the wrong way? He eyed Castiel as he considered it, just in case the human decided to launch another attack. While the human didn’t appear to possess anything that could truly harm Dean he wasn’t in the mood to keep healing his vessel from the strange weapon Castiel had struck him with. It was impossible to be angry about it, however, with the human so close. For an angel who’d never rebuilt a human before he thought he’d done quite a good job; the man was just a tad shorter than his vessel with wide shoulders, a slight five o’ clock shadow along his jaw, and bright blue eyes that were stunning even narrowed as they currently were. 

The sound of laughter suddenly broke through Dean’s runaway train of thought leaving him to blink at Castiel in confusion. The human wasn’t laughing--the stony look on his face was the furthest thing from it--which meant the sound was coming from inside Dean’s head. The realization that his vessel of all people was laughing at him made him wilt because seriously? He turned to Castiel with wide eyes, hoping the human wasn’t going to join in despite the fact there was no way he could have heard the laughter. “I’m Dean.” The angel rushed out since everything had already gone off the rails. “I’m an angel of the Lord.”

What. the. Actual. Fuck. Castiel blinked, then blinked again for good measure because there was no way he’d heard what he thought he just heard. “You’re an angel?” He asked, one eyebrow hitched high in obvious surprise. Forget being a monster, this dude was obviously out of his gourd! It was kind of a shame considering the guy would have been Castiel’s type in another life; lean, windswept brown hair, and a nicely trimmed beard Cas itched to touch. Not to mention those piercing eyes that were now looking at him like Cas had somehow kicked the guy’s puppy. Still, he couldn’t help himself from pushing all that further: “What kind of angel is named Dean?”

“I am!” Dean retorted, straightening up indignantly. “I am an angel of the Lord,” he repeated like Cas had somehow missed the point the first time. “I was chosen to be the one to pull your soul from the Pit.” Surely the human couldn’t deny that since they were both here, right?

For a brief moment Castiel didn’t know whether to laugh or to cry. He’d give the guy one thing--he was certainly persistent. “Look, Dean, if that is your real name.” He sighed, waving one hand in the air in a dismissive gesture. “I don’t know what your game is here but it’s not funny. First off there’s no such thing as angels, and secondly if there were I highly doubt one would care enough about me to gank me out of Hell!”

Castiel’s words hurt deeper than Dean thought possible but instead of deflating he could feel angel boiling in his veins. Things may have not turned out the way he intended them to but he’d never lied to the human! Why would he? Dean knew what he’d done and he was sure Castiel knew it too if he went looking deep enough. Until then… “Fine.” He snapped, dropping his hand away from the strange weapon and actually backing up. “I’ll prove it then.”

“Go for it!” Castiel scoffed, rolling his eyes. Since Dean had relinquished his hold on the pie iron Castiel pulled it back close and tightened his grip on the handle. If he swung it hard enough he was sure he’d be able to knock the guy out and then escape. 

This was probably not the brightest idea ever but Dean wasn’t about to back down from a challenge. Besides, it’d be worth whatever punishment Bobby would no doubt dish out if he managed to make Castiel believe him. He backed up further until there was ample space between him and the human before he stopped. He shot Castiel a cocky grin before he straightened up, puffing his chest out. His eyes flared bright as a white light slowly surrounded his vessel. It grew brighter and brighter, expanding outward as two large shadows unfurled from behind his body. 

_ Holy shit.  _ Holy. Shit. Castiel felt his jaw drop open but he hardly cared; all his attention was swallowed up in watching Dean. He couldn’t believe what he was seeing--those were wings!!--and he was afraid if he blinked the illusion would shatter. Never before in his life had he seen something so, so magnificent.  _ My God, he really  _ is  _ an angel! _

Dean felt his wings unfurl slowly but his attention wasn’t on them; no, it was locked instead on the look of awe spreading across Castiel’s face. He felt himself grin, despite himself, for surely the human had to believe him now! His wings spread out, smoky black in shadows as they easily dwarfed the space between them. For the space of a heartbeat he looked regal and deadly, truly one of heaven’s soldiers. A blink later and the illusion was shattered; the light, the wings disappeared leaving Dean standing there like he had before the light show. The cocky smile was still in place, however, as he waited to see what Castiel’s reaction would be.

For his part Castiel found himself rendered speechless. His mouth opened and closed wordlessly but nothing beyond a weak croak managed to escape. What was there to say to that? He felt a bit hysterical, caught between wanting to run for it and wanting to throw himself at Dean’s feet and apologizing. He’d come to regret it later, Castiel was sure, but after a few more seconds the decision was taken out of his hands. Numb fingers dropped the iron to the dirt between them as Castiel slowly backed away. It was a coward’s move, he knew, but he couldn’t do this. He had to get away from here. Now. 

Uncaring that he was leaving a literal angel in the dust, one who’d easily be able to chase him, Castiel turned and ran. He darted off into the wide openness of the field like the very hounds of Hell were nipping at his heels. He didn’t look back.


	11. Chapter XI

Dean’s cocky grin faded away to nothing as he watched Castiel run away from him. He watched until the human disappeared from sight before slowly turning away. Of all the outcomes he had planned he hadn’t actually thought the human would run from him. The angel deflated like an opened balloon and he didn’t need to be told that the crushing feeling growing in his chest was disappointment. “Now what do I do?” He muttered into the still air, sighing when his vessel didn’t answer. He didn’t know enough about the man to be sure, but it was likely he felt the same upset Dean did at this new development. Still, standing around sad never got anyone anywhere. With one last, long look in the direction Castiel had taken off in Dean flapped his wings and disappeared. He had questions that needed answering and he was certain Bobby would be able to help him.

When Dean arrived in Heaven moments later he wasn't surprised to see Bobby waiting there for him. The older angel took a long look at him, and Dean wasn’t sure what he looked like but judging by the older angel’s frown it wasn’t good. Just barely resisting the urge to curl his wings inward in submission, Dean bowed his head and waited for whatever Bobby’s judgement would be.

He didn’t have long to wait. In the drawn out silence between them Bobby huffed before reaching out and popping Dean on the head with one of his wings. It was a move he used regularly with disobedient fledglings and Dean felt his face heat in a strange combination of relief and confusion. “Well c’mon then,” Bobby said before Dean could get himself worked up too far. “Let’s hear it. Just by lookin’ at you I can tell this is going to be quite the story!” Then, before Dean could spill his guts all over the hall the younger angel found himself being led away. 

Instead of being led to the throne room like Dean had thought, Bobby veered right down a different hallway. Confused, Dean stood there for a few seconds, glancing between Bobby’s retreating back and the hall that led to the throne room. “Uh, Bobby?” He finally spoke up when it seemed like the older angel was simply going to keep on going. “Shouldn’t we--”

“Nope!” Bobby cut his question off mid-sentence, and kept on going. Dean wasted another few seconds staring after him, gobsmacked. He’d never had a talk with Bobby or one of the higher ranked angels that hadn’t taken place near the throne room and to be heading away from it was low-key blowing his mind. Finally, reluctantly, Dean got the lead out and took off after Bobby before he got too far away. He didn’t recognize where they were going but Dean trusted Bobby to not lead them too astray. He caught up with the other angel easily and fell in line beside him. While it was on the top of his tongue to ask where they were heading Dean managed to refrain. Considering Bobby had shut him down with a simple word before it was more than likely the same would happen again, or worse, he wouldn’t answer. 

Dean’s restraint paid off a few moments later when they turned into yet another hallway. Instead of going down this one, however, Bobby stopped in front of the first door and forced Dean to stop as well. “We’re here.” The older angel grumped as he pushed open the door and stepped back to let Dean enter first. “Don’t go touching anything in there!”

What? Dean opened his mouth to ask just what it was he wasn’t supposed to touch when he found himself unceremoniously pushed inside the room. Bright sunlight and a wide array of colors blinded him and Dean raised an arm to block out the sight as he stumbled forward. The warmth hit him next--a tropical warmth that sufficed him to the core and reminded him of flying low through the Earth’s tropical waters. Dean blinked, startled, and was shocked to find the world around him awash in green. Slowly lowering his arm he stared in awe at the veritable sea of plants and flowers and trees that stretched further than his eyes could see. Dean felt his breath hitch in his chest; he’d heard tales of heaven’s gardens but he had never figured he’d be witnessing such beauty himself. He was so in awe it took several seconds before Bobby’s warning about not touching anything to sink back in and Dean pulled his hand back from a strange fern-like bush just in time. 

“Don’t think I didn’t see that boy,” Bobby groused from behind Dean, but when the younger angel turned his head to look he found Bobby to be grinning. “Now I know this isn’t the usual place to be meeting but I figured you needed a change of pace. Especially since I can see the million and one things running through that fool head of yours that I figure you don’t want half of heaven knowing about. Stop me when I’m wrong.” At Dean’s wide-eyed nod, he went on with a chuckle. “Okay then, out with it. What, or should I say who’s got your wings all tied in a knot?”

**-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-**

“You are so, so stupid!” Castiel moaned to himself as he watched a bird wheel overhead in the clear blue sky. After taking off from Dean the hunter had picked a direction at random and had run until he literally couldn’t take another step. As a result he found himself back in a field, though he was fairly sure it was a different one than the one he’d originally found himself in. Now he lay panting in the growing warmth of the day as he struggled not only to catch his breath but his equilibrium as well. Why had he run? He wondered, eyes absently tracking the bird’s progress through the sky.  _ I ran away from an angel. An honest to god angel!!  _ The thought had been twisting in his head for some time now and yet he still hadn’t managed to come to terms with what he’d seen. How could he? Castiel had never really put much stock in the whole Heaven and Hell afterlife thing. Oh, he knew Hell existed. It was pretty hard to deny that demons were the cause of most of his family's demise, and that wasn’t even counting his trip down south. But Heaven? Angels? It made sense in a Bible loving kind of way but still the idea didn’t sit right with Castiel.

“Why me? Huh?” He asked the sky, like it was listening. Who knew, if angels existed then maybe they really were watching over him, absurd as that sounded. “Why not Michael or Lucifer? Or Gabriel, huh? Why didn’t they deserve to be saved?” Castiel was ashamed to find himself stumbling over his brother’s names, the grief raw in his throat. It had been years since his older brothers had been killed yet the grief still lay open and raw as an open sore. The knowledge that Castiel came very close to adding Gabriel to that list made the rest of his words ball up in his throat, unable to get further. He choked, but all that came out was a strangled sob and then before Castiel knew what happened he found himself crying. All of the grief from losing his family, from finding Gabriel dead, to waking up in that field all alone: all of it came pouring out. Why him? Castiel was probably the most unworthiest one of his entire family so why did he end up being the one who was saved? It just didn’t make  _ sense! _

It took some time, but eventually the tears finally flowed to a stop. By that time Castiel’s head was pounding in tempo with his heart and the sun had moved positions in the sky, but he couldn’t deny he felt better. Some of those tears had been there as long as his family had been gone; crying hadn’t fixed things, but at least some of the unbearable pressure that had been built up was now gone. But now what? He wondered as he slowly sat up. Green grass and a smattering of wild flowers stretched out far in every direction with a wood line in the far distance. It was nice, peaceful in a way Castiel hadn’t felt in years. He closed his eyes as he inhaled it, letting the feeling sink into his bones. Part of him wished he could remain here forever in this feeling. Surely he deserved a bit of peace after the tortures of Hell? 

Sadly Castiel’s body disagreed; it grumbled, clearly unhappy with his lack of food intake. So much for forever, Cas thought sadly as he made his way to standing. As nice as the field was he was fairly sure food wasn’t going to magically appear before him. Snorting to himself over such an absurd thought, he picked a direction at random and set off. 

It took a good hour by his estimate but eventually Castiel found himself back at the building where he and Dean had met. Thankfully, while there were a few cars in the parking lot nobody was lingering outside, including Dean. Cas didn’t know what to think about the strange twist in his stomach at realizing the Angel wasn’t there, but he staunchly ignored it. Instead he put his focus into hot wiring one of the cars in the lot. Some cursing and close calls later he found himself out on the road with no idea where he was headed. 

For a while the landscape was the same, full of fields and trees and little else. Castiel shook his head at it all, wondering why Gabriel had chosen to leave him here of all places. It was just all...too nice. Finally nature gave way as houses started dotting the landscape and before Castiel knew it he was approaching town limits. He was absolutely floored to realize he was back in Reedsville again! Gabriel hadn’t even left the town they’d be in, let alone the state and the knowledge blew Castiel’s mind. He couldn’t fathom what his brother had been thinking beyond perhaps acknowledging that he hadn’t been thinking at all. Surely that was the only explanation for all of this? They had discussed where Castiel had wanted buried; he had wanted to be near his family, not all alone in the middle of nowhere! And just as if the heavens had heard him, and honestly Cas wasn’t discounting that one these days, parked alongside a brick building just ahead was a very familiar golden car. There was simply no way it was a coincidence, he thought as he pulled into the parking space behind it. Truly how many 1978 Lincoln Continental Mark V’s would be running around this small of a town? While it wasn’t completely  _ impossible  _ Castiel knew his car when he saw it and he was looking at it! Suddenly enraged, he pushed his way out of the stolen car and marched right up to the driver’s side door of his. 

There, sitting in the driver’s seat, sound asleep, was none other than Gabriel himself. Having had enough of his brother’s hijinks, Castiel rapped loudly on the driver’s side window, mighty pleased when his brother bolted upright in the seat. Golden eyes looked around wildly before finally landing on Castiel, and as he watched, the blood drained so fast out of Gabriel’s face he looked ready to pass out. The older man flinched away from the window like he’d seen a ghost, and about that time it sunk into Castiel that maybe startling his brother hadn’t been the best idea. Not knowing how to fix this with the car door between them Castiel gave a little wave while trying not to recall seeing his family doing the same when he was hallucinating. 

Apparently Gabriel was not easily mollified; in the space of a blink he pulled a gun out of somewhere and held it up to the window in warning. “Go away you freak!” He cried, eyes wide and wild in shock. “Leave me to suffer alone!”

While most people would back away when they had a gun pulled on them, Castiel did the opposite. He glowered and leaned in closer until his face was mere inches away from the window. “If you shoot my windows out there will be no place you can hide from me!” He growled, deadly serious. Nobody shot his car and got away with it, including justifiably distraught brothers!

That hadn’t been the reaction he was expecting, and for a long drawn out moment Gabriel simply gaped. He may have been out of his mind with grief but even then he wasn’t crazy enough to imagine a ghost pissed off about the car. Still, he didn’t lower the gun even as he whispered out a shaky: “Cassie? Is that really you?”

Despite himself, Castiel felt his face break out into a gummy grin. He knew he’d be able to get through his brother one way or the other. “It’s me in the flesh!” He confirmed, beyond grateful he was able to break through to Gabriel so fast.

There was a flurry of movement inside the car at Castiel’s words before the door was being flung open. It missed Castiel by mere centimeters but he could hardly bring himself to care when he had his arms full of big brother two seconds later. There were no words but Gabriel clung onto him like a koala, like he was afraid Castiel would somehow vanish if he closed his eyes. Castiel didn’t care; he simply hugged back just as hard and was not surprised to feel the tears rolling down his face once more. He still had a million and one questions but for now he was simply content to know he’d been reunited with his brother.

**-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-**

At Bobby’s words Dean all but deflated, wings drooping and all. “I don’t even know where to start!” He cried, turning away from Bobby to look out amongst the garden. The landscape was peaceful and oh, how Dean wished some of that peace would seep into him. He really didn’t know where to start because how do you explain something you can’t even comprehend? “There’s just...so much…” He finally settled on, though the words sounded like a weak excuse at best. Dean was a soldier, he’d been taught to follow orders and obey, not follow...whatever these weird sensations were wanting him to do. He finally looked back at Bobby, a frown firmly in place. “I don’t know how to describe it.” 

Ah, to be young again! Bobby shook his head, amused despite knowing better. “I didn’t expect to be having this talk again, and certainly not with you.” The older angel finally said though he still looked more amused than anything. “You’re changing, is all this is.’ Bobby met Dean’s frown with a knowing grin. “And before you go off all half cocked on me just listen. Just because you’re changing doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing. It just means your eyes are opened a bit more now is all.”

“But...I thought angels weren’t supposed to change?” Dean asked, half afraid of what the answer would be. Although Bobby looked like this was no big deal the churning inside Dean proved differently. Changing into what? Was something happening to him? Why hadn’t anyone else mentioned this happening to them? “Why haven’t I heard of this before?”

That got Bobby; Dean could see the moment the older angel sighed, like he was completely done with the conversation already. “I didn’t say every angel changed, did I?” He groused, “and that’s exactly why you haven’t heard of it--not many go through it. The last one was a very long time ago, well before you were even a fledgling.”

That gave Dean pause, but… “Why me? I haven’t done anything! I don’t want to change!” Even without knowing all the details Dean was sure it was something he didn’t want to have any part of! 

It was shocking to see an angel do a human thing like rolling their eyes but Bobby went and did it anyway. He knew Dean could be pigheaded at the best of times but this was a level of genuine stubbornness even he hadn’t anticipated! “It ain’t like you’re going to get a say in it.” He pointed out with more patience than he currently felt. “And why not? You can’t honestly say you’re pleased with the way things have been going lately. I know about your little sightseeing trips down to Earth.”

Dean ducked his head, embarrassed that Bobby knew about his little hobby. He’d done his best to keep it hidden from everyone but apparently he hadn’t done a good enough job if Bobby had noticed him. Had anyone else? Dean wasn’t sure he wanted to know if anyone had; he was certain they wouldn’t be quite so accepting like Bobby was. “I’m..not…” He finally said, though the words seemed more meant for himself rather than Bobby. “And I don’t know how long it’s been like this, you know? For the longest time I was perfectly content to follow the orders given to me and I didn’t question anything. And..and now I want to question everything! Plus there’s all these thoughts and feelings and strange sensations and I don’t know what to do with any of them!”

Bobby watched him solemnly for a moment before finally nodding. “You done?” He asked, one eyebrow cocked like he thought Dean was going to launch into another rant. At seeing the younger angel’s nod he broke into his biggest grin yet. “Sounds like you’re well on your way yo changing whether you’re ready or not!” The older angel seemed gleeful as he reached out and laid a comforting hand on Dean’s shoulder. “I know it’s scary ‘cause it was scary when I was goin’ through it but you’ll be alright. Now tell me about how it went with Castiel.”

Dean’s head was spinning--Bobby had changed? But why? The older angel had always seemed the same since Dean had known him which meant Bobby had to have changed before Dean met him. Which brought up even more questions, namely, what had Bobby been like before and what had caused him to change in the first place? As much as he desperately wanted answers to all of the questions Dean forced himself to keep his mouth shut. Badgering Bobby had never worked well in the past, why would now be any different? Besides, talking about Castiel was something Dean absolutely  _ could  _ do. “You should see him Bobby! He’s a force of nature; he even managed to injure my vessel!” Okay, so getting hit with whatever the weapon Castiel had been wielding probably shouldn’t have made the highlight reel but oh well. “He didn’t believe me when I told him I was an angel.” Dean went on, sounding sad. “So I showed him my wings but he ran…”

Bobby shook his head, more amused than he wanted to let on. The poor boy had it bad and didn’t even know it. Bobby didn’t know whether to pity him or laugh until all of heaven rang from the sound. Finally he settled for doing neither, instead settling with a fond shake of his head. “Yeah, you’ll be fine.” He muttered, using the hand he still had on Dean’s shoulder to steer him towards the door. “Now get goin’ before I have to come up with a reason to why you’re in here!”


	12. Chapter XII

To say Castiel had been appalled to learn Gabriel had been living in his car was an understatement. He’d been caught somewhere between horrified and pissed because he couldn’t believe Gabriel had let himself go so easily in a handful of months. Needless to say there had been a good deal of yelling involved from both sides before they finally devolved back into the hugging and crying fest they’d started with. That didn’t mean things were magically better, however, and the pounding tempest in Castiel’s head simply confirmed it. At some point during the conversation he’d crawled in the passenger seat and had been content to let Gabriel drive wherever he pleased. Now as he found himself looking around a rapidly darkening parking lot Castiel had to wonder if he’d made the right decision. He looked up at the large half lit neon sign that declared ‘SHOP’ in bright red letters hanging above the store front they’d parked in front of. The sign, coupled with the row of carts in the brightly lit lobby made it obvious the place was a grocery store for what little good that was. To Castiel, it didn’t mean a damn thing. He honestly couldn’t even remember the last time he’d had enough cash to go into a grocery store, let alone actually been inside one. “I’m sorry.” He finally said at length when the silence between them had grown stale. “I know it doesn’t help any but I am. For everything.”

Gabriel was brooding and he knew it yet he couldn’t make himself stop. He had the one thing he’d been wanting for four months now--Castiel alive and back with him--and yet he still felt like part of his soul was still missing. It was maddening and pissing him off all at one time. He’d initially thought it had everything to do with the little brother currently sitting in the passenger seat but after they came to blows Gabriel realized it wasn’t about Castiel at all. Deep down, where he could barely admit to himself, Gabriel knew what was wrong. He’d been off ever since he’d gone to that damned club with Balth and no matter how he tried to hide it he knew it was true. Even sitting here safe in the car in a public parking lot he didn’t feel safe. The look of horror and betrayal on Meg’s beautiful heart-shaped face still haunted him; if he concentrated hard enough Gabriel could swear he could still taste her blood upon his lips… 

Ugh. He shuddered, forcing the memory back to where it belonged just in time to hear Castiel apologize. And didn’t that just make him feel like a big ‘ole piece of shit? Castiel had  _ saved  _ him, had paid the ultimate price and  _ gone to Hell  _ for him and yet he felt obligated to apologize. It made Gabriel want to scream. Thankfully--because he was sure once he started he wouldn’t be able to stop--Gabriel tamped the urge down as he sadly looked at his brother. “Cas. Kiddo…” He sighed; he was so bad at this. Why was he so bad at this? “You don’t have anything to apologize for. This one is all on me.” In more ways than Castiel knew… If only Gabriel had never gone to the club in the first place!

**-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-**

Dean couldn’t believe his luck; what had he done now? It had been bad enough when he got summoned to the throne room the first time around, but to be going for a second round? Dean couldn’t even fathom what he could have done wrong this time. He’d been feeling somewhat better about things after his talk with Bobby but all those feelings were fading away the closer he got to the door. Taking a deep breath that he didn’t need, he pushed through the door with his head held high. 

Just like before he wasn't surprised to see John and Mary there as well as Bobby. Inwardly Dean sighed, all hope gone because whatever was going down this time couldn’t have been good. Still, nothing could have prepared him for Bobby looking him in the eye and saying: “It’s Castiel.” Just like that Dean felt his stomach drop to his feet because what had his human gotten into now? Surely he hadn’t managed to get himself killed and returned to Hell...laying siege the first time had been bad enough; Dean wasn’t sure they’d be able to do it a second time. Though apparently he needed to pay better attention to things instead of jumping straight to the worst case scenario for Bobby had gone on while Dean was daydreaming. “--Seems his brother has gotten himself in deep with a demon named Asmodeus. We don’t know all the details but Asmodeus is the one to blame for Gabriel’s death the first time around which led to Castiel making the decision he did.”

What was the appropriate response to finding out the human you rescued wasn’t in trouble but his family was? Dean struggled to keep his face straight but it was hard to do when all he felt was relief. He was worried about the brother, Gabriel, he wasn’t that awful, but Dean was glad it wasn’t Castiel. Just the thought of going back through the demon infested fire and brimstone landscape of Hell made his feathers shiver in distress. Still, none of what Bobby had said was good. Dean hadn’t met Gabriel, though he knew the man was Castiel’s only living brother and that alone meant Castiel would be devastated if anything happened to him. The feeling that he was about to agree to something he really wasn’t going to enjoy was back but Dean hardly cared as he looked around at the grim faces of John and Mary. He knew what had to be done and before he could overthink it he found himself saying: “I’ll take care of it.”

“Are you sure, son?” Bobby asked, surprise writ all over his face as he regarded Dean. “I didn’t bring you here to toss this on your shoulders alone. I’m not gonna lie to you: this isn’t going to be easy. Asmodeus is well known to be a sly bastard at the best of times and the fact he’s after your boy’s brother spells trouble in a big way. There’s no telling what he’ll do to get what he wants. Everything we did to rescue Castiel from Hell could easily be undone if Asmodeus is allowed to get his way. It wouldn’t be past him to kill Castiel just to get to Gabriel.”

Dean digested it all but he already knew it wasn’t going to change his mind; if there was any way for him to help Castiel he was going to do it. Not that he had the foggiest idea what to do regarding a demon who was gunning for a hunter… Oh well, he’d learn as he went along, right? Straightening up he gave Bobby his best ‘I’m paying attention’ look and nodded. “Cas needs me; I can do this, Bobby.” There was a scoff from John’s direction but Dean ignored him; nothing else mattered beyond being allowed to help Castiel and his brother.

His determination must have shown for Bobby finally relented with a nod. “Alright. Iffen you think you can handle it then I don’t see a problem letting you go. Just make sure you report back regularly. The sooner we know what Asmodeus is up to, the better.”

“Yes sir.” Dean said before turning on his heel and striding out of there as fast as he dared. While he was excited to see Castiel again the weight of the demon problem couldn’t be ignored. Part of him hoped that Bobby had simply been exaggerating but he knew that was impossible; Bobby had never exaggerated anything in his life! Dean was so wrapped up in his thoughts he wasn’t paying a lick of attention to where he was going--something that changed when he ran smack into a solid mass. “Oof!”

Dean stumbled backwards, blinking in surprise when he looked up...and up...to find none other than Sam staring down at him with an amused smile on his face. “Too busy thinking to watch where you’re going?” The younger angel teased as he reached a hand down to help Dean up. “I heard you got summoned again. Are you going for a record or something?”

“Nah man.” Dean laughed but he let Sam hoist him up nevertheless. “I certainly hope not! As much as I like Bobby I don’t want to be seeing his ugly mug over and over again, you know?”

“Yeah, I can see that!” Sam joined in the laughter but cut out first as he peered at Dean. “There’s something different about you these days.” He observed, though the look on his face was more curious than anything else. “You’ve been different since we came back from Hell. Did something happen down there with the soul?”

So much for keeping things a secret! Dean’s eyes darted up and down the hallway as he internally freaked out because did he have this whole thing spelled out on his head, or what? In spite of not seeing anyone else Dean did what he usually did when panicking and went on the offense. He grabbed a hold of Sam and swung his backwards into the nearest wall, getting mere inches away from his face. “Nothing happened down there with the soul!” He hissed desperately, knowing that Sam would see right through him in a heartbeat. That was what happened when you spent hundreds of years together.

“Yeah, sure Dean.” Sam remarked dryly as he found himself slammed into the wall. A quiet ‘oof’ escaped him but otherwise he simply stared his friend down with a raised eyebrow. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” Sam went on, completely unfazed by Dean’s antics, “but you know I’m here for you, right? Whatever this…” He waved his hand feebly between the two of them. “..Is, I’m still on your side. Brothers don’t leave brothers hanging in the lurch, right?”

Just like that all the wind blew right out of Dean’s sails leaving him floundering and lost. Sam’s words were like a one-two punch to the gut and had the intended effect of making Dean back off. He let go of Sam and backed down though he still remained close. “Yeah.” He said at last, his shoulders lowering down to normal. “You’re right. I know you’re on my side; I just don’t know what came over me.”

To Dean’s surprise and immense relief Sam chuckled and reached out to clap him on the back. “You’ve got a lot on your plate.” He said, though the look in his eyes indicated he understood what Dean was going through, probably better than Dean himself did. “Whatever is going down you know where to find me if you need backup!” Still chuckling, Sam patted Dean once more on the back before heading off down the hallway, humming to himself.

Dean stood and watched him go with a shake of his head. How he got friends like Sam he didn’t know, but he was surely grateful nonetheless. With that in mind he spread his wings and headed back to Earth. He had work to do.


	13. Chapter XIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter warning: The first part of this chapter contains a disturbing and creepy nightmare. Non-con, some mentions of torture is mentioned later on in the chapter.
> 
> Art in this chapter is by Aggiedoll

Gabriel reached out, flicking the radio off. Instantly the cab of the car was plunged into relative silence as the harsh sounds of static that'd been emanating from the speakers was cut off. Gabriel sighed, the sound nearly lost underneath the hum of the motor and the residual ringing in his ears, but he was relieved nevertheless. He'd been driving down this stretch of dark highway for what felt like hours now and the feeling of being cooped up in the car was starting to get to him. He blinked suddenly gritty eyes and glanced over at the passenger seat--only to frown at seeing it empty. He frowned, not remembering dropping Cas off somewhere along the way but he had to have, hadn't he? One just couldn't get up and disappear from a moving car! _'Damn, Gabe, get a grip!'_ he chided himself, hating the way his voice sounded unexpectedly shaky in the stillness of the car. Of course Cas wasn't in the car with him; it was hardly the first time Gabriel had dropped his brother off somewhere between a hunt and had gone back to get him later on. "A good night's rest is what I need." He muttered to himself as he turned his attention back to the road.

Two seconds later Gabriel found himself wide awake anyways as something darted across the road in front of the car. Panicked, he slammed on the breaks and the next few seconds were lost in a blur of patchy fog, blinding headlights, and the loud squeal of tires on asphalt. When Gabriel thought he could blink again without vertigo making him want to puke he was horrified to see there was a man standing alongside the road, watching him. Horror seeped into his bones as he stared back, only for the sensation to solidify into ice upon the realization that he _recognized_ the man standing there. It was impossible, beyond it even, as he whispered out a broken: "Dad?"

Chuck Novak looked much the same he'd looked the last time Gabriel had seen him alive, clad in a ratty striped bathrobe with a coffee mug full of booze in one hand and a closed laptop in the other. All Gabriel could do was gape because _this couldn't be happening!_ Chuck had perished alongside most of his family nearly twenty years ago--something Gabriel still had nightmares about--so this was impossible! For his part Gabriel simply started, mouth agape and speechless. He'd dreamed of seeing his father again but this exact scenario had never even crossed his mind. How was this even happening?! 

For better or worse, between one blink and the next Chuck was gone. In his place, however, was someone far worse in Gabe’s opinion: his mother Naomi. Despite the dark, the fog, and the fact that Gabriel was sure he’d lost his mind somehow, Naomi looked as fierce as ever. The scowl on her perfectly painted lips as she eyed her middle child was something Gabriel still dreamed about, and not in the good way. He swallowed hard, torn between too many emotions to even begin fitting names to them. Naomi opened her mouth, possibly to utter a scathing retort that Gabriel remembered so well but before she could utter a sound she was gone. Vanished like she hadn’t even been there. 

Gabriel simply blinked dumbly, too caught between wanting to laugh and wanting to burst into tears to feel much of anything else. He turned his attention back to the road, blinking away the burning wetness in his eyes as he stared out into the dark. Why them? Why now? Why here, in the middle of the night in the middle of abso-freakin’-nowhere? Not for the first time, Gabriel wished Castiel was here with him. His younger brother would probably feel just as disturbed as he did, but it would have been nice to have some company to prove he wasn’t going out of his mind. . . 

. . . And speaking of brothers. . . Against his will Gabriel found his eyes sliding back to the edge of the road, and sure enough, standing there where his parents had been stood Gabriel and Castiel’s two eldest brothers. Fraternal twins, Michael and Lucifer made up for their lack of sameness with matching disproving scowls that would have made their mother proud. Gabriel froze, feeling very much like a rat caught in a trap by two overly eager cats. Michael and Lucifer had been competitive bastards in life with everything from the football field to battling one another for their parents affections. Gabriel supposed the correct term nowadays would be ‘fighting like cats and dogs’ but with twin looks of revolusion heading his way all he felt was fear. It was ridiculous, especially considering Gabriel was now older than the twins had been when they were killed, but still, some memories never died. The twisted barbs, the beatings that their parents never seemed to notice… Gabriel shuddered under the weight of the recall, and turned his head away. Of all the horrors he’d witnessed, all the things he’d seen during his years of hunting, seeing his brothers again was a sight he didn’t need. The thought made his chest pulse, though with sympathy or something else, he didn’t know. 

Yet he didn’t look back. His gaze remained on the road ahead, peering out into the long, dark night. Between the fog and the dark there was nothing to see beyond oblivion. Gabriel shook his head, cursing himself a fool as he started the car again. Surely, whatever was out there was better than being stuck here with bad memories and a dead family. So he drove, uncaring of what could come forward compared to what he was leaving behind. 

Sixty seconds. That's approximately how long it took Gabriel to deeply regret his decision to drive away from the haunting reminder of his family. Between one blink and the next the fog in front of the car parted revealing a very familiar man in a pristine white suit. Gabriel's stomach and heart lurched as one as he slammed on the breaks but it was too late to stop--he was too close... He slammed his eyes shut, dreading the inevitable *thud* that would signify him hitting the guy but...it never happened. Warily, he opened his eyes again only to gape at the empty space in the road where there should have been a body. Nothing was there, and for the life of him Gabriel didn't know whether to be relieved or horrified.

"Holy shit!" He swore, voice choked with an emotion he couldn't name. That had been far, far too close for comfort! He shuddered, feeling ready to tremble apart right then and there. What the fuck was all this? Surely it was a dream, right? Though the more he considered it, the more Gabriel doubted it was. He had a creative imagination, sure, but he couldn't ever recall having a dream anything like this before! "Get a grip, man!" He told himself as he looked up...only to freeze. The man was standing in the road again.

For just shy of eternity, Gabriel stared. What else was there to do? His heart beat a hard rhythm in his chest as he stared down the one person he didn't think he'd ever see again. Asmodeus, and make no mistake it was clearly him, stared back with hooded, dark eyes that made Gabriel shudder for a whole different reason. Just the weight of his gaze upon Gabe made him feel vulnerable, like the man was staring through him to his soul. The flush spreading up from his chest was humiliating along with the barely kept in check urge to look down to confirm he was still fully clothed.

And how fucked was that? Asmodeus had spent _days_ torturing Gabriel and had gotten off on every filthy thing he'd done to the hunter. Just t _hinking_ about it hurt soul-deep and left Gabriel feeling like he was going to puke. The feeling only intensified as Asmodeus took several steps closer to the driver’s side door. “Holy shit! Holy fucking _shit!_ Holy freakin’ Mothra!” Gabe rambled, wide-eyed in fear as he watched him get closer and closer. Thankfully some part of his brain was still thinking logically because without fully deciding on it his foot slammed on the gas pedal. Gravel spun out as the car made an unholy lurching sound before it shot forward like a rocket. All Gabriel could do was laugh hysterically even as he clung to the steering wheel for dear life. He didn’t look back.

Just when he was starting to safe, when it seemed certain that there was no way Asmodeus could catch him, Gabriel let his guard down. It was a mistake; he risked a glance in the rear view, just one, but it was enough. Asmodeus was right there, back in the middle of the road when Gabe looked up but it was too late. He hit the brakes and the squealing of tires rent the air but there was no way the car was going to stop in time. Gabriel screamed as the car plowed right through Asmodeus like he was made of nothing more than smoke before coming to a violent, abrupt halt several feet down the road. For several long, agonizing seconds Gabriel sat frozen, body rigid. His hands still clutched the steering wheel tightly, his knuckles turning white from the force. What the hell was he supposed to do now? He needed to get out and check out the damage, not just to the car--and oh god, Cas was going to kill him if he damaged the car!--but to Asmodeus as well. Gabe wasn’t a doctor by any stretch of the imagination but he knew there was no way the guy could have survived being hit like that. 

So...why wasn’t he moving?

It was a question Gabe had no answer for. It was like his brain had gone offline somewhere along the ride and had yet to reboot itself. Deep down inside, it was fear that kept him in his seat, pure and simple. Even most likely dead he was too far afraid of Asmodeus to even get out and look at his body. “When did I turn into such a coward?” He sighed, gaze fixed out into the middle distance. 

“Probably about the time you met me, boy!” A familiar, heavily Southern accented voice growled from the backseat seconds before a cold clammy hand latched onto Gabriel’s right ankle and began to pull. . . 

Gabriel lurched upright with a gasp, knees drawing instinctively towards his chest as he realized he wasn’t in the car. As the darkness around him settled into coherent shapes it became apparent that he was, in fact, in the crappy motel room he and Cas had picked when they stopped for the night. The sheer relief was invigorating, washing away the lingering fear from the dream as he looked towards the other side of the room. There, sprawled out on the other bed and half buried under a mound of blankets was Castiel. The knot of tension that had built up in Gabriel’s chest deflated at the sight as he let out a whooshing breath. 

_It was just a dream!_ He told himself, though the realization fixed nothing. The fear still lingered, sharp and piercing and Gabe knew if he closed his eyes he’d find himself right back there again. Groaning softly to himself he scrubbed at his face with one hand as he tried to figure out what to do. Going back to sleep obviously wasn’t an option, and as much as he wanted to, waking Castiel wasn’t one either. His brother could be a real dick when he didn’t get enough sleep and after the past few days that they’d had Gabriel was loath to interrupt his rest. That only left one option then: he needed a drink. Preferably, several of them. 

It was almost comical the way he slithered out of bed and got dressed in the dark. A laugh bubbled up unexpectedly as he realized he was acting just like a teenager in a sitcom trying to sneak out of the house in the middle of the night. Better late than never, he figured, having never had the opportunity to try it out himself. When he finally deemed himself ready he slunk his way to the door, only to pause at the threshold to glance back at his brother. 

Somewhere during his sneaking around Cas had shifted, his face now facing towards the door. He looked tired, Gabriel noted with a frown. It was just like his little brother to take the weight of the world on his shoulders but it was disheartening to see the way he didn’t even seem to relax in sleep. “It’ll work out.” Gabriel whispered, though he wasn’t sure if the words were meant for himself or for Castiel. Either way he was sure they could work things out in the end, somehow. They didn’t really have a choice otherwise.

**-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-**

The weather outside was surprisingly nice for being the middle of the night for the time of year it was. Not too hot, nor too cold with no fog to be seen. Gabriel let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding as he drank it all in. The churning feelings from the nightmare were still lingering, but for now it was nice to see some calm in the world. He pulled his jacket closer together as he surveyed the area. He’d been so dog-tired when they pulled in he hadn’t paid much attention but now that he was wide awake it was time to check things out! Surely there was a bar around here somewhere--almost every little town had one in some form or another. With that in mind Gabriel picked a direction at random and headed off. 

Luckily for him the motel was located on the fringes of a small town and within minutes Gabriel found himself walking along a darkened street. At first glance the place seemed to be one of those everything-shuts-down-at-nine p.m. types of places considering everything he passed was closed. Not that there was much: an old-styled brick bank, a towering court house, and a smattering of small businesses ranging from a laundromat to one of those hipster cafes that seemed to be everywhere nowadays. Gabriel rolled his eyes at the kitschy name--Brew HA HA!--as he passed, though if given the choice he definitely could have gone for some coffee about now. Sadly, the place was as closed as the rest of them, dark and decidedly empty. Shrugging his shoulders in defeat, Gabriel continued on his way.

Another turn brought him onto a residential street capped by a massive brick school that looked closer to being a castle than anything else. The sight paled in comparison to what was directly across from it, however, for located in the bottom of a three-story brick building was a lit neon sign declaring it was a 24-7 diner. “Bingo!” Gabe crowed, uncaring that he was talking to himself as he hurried down the street towards the diner. While it wasn’t a bar he was certain the place sold coffee considering the hour and that was good enough for him.

The diner was well-lit on the inside with plain beige walls and a scattering of small round tables and chairs that looked like they’d come straight out of a 90’s sitcom. That seemed to be the theme of the place, or something very close to it as Gabe opened the door only to be greeted by the sounds of Seal’s “Crazy” playing across the speakers. He blinked, a little startled, but ultimately pleased by the choice. Anyplace that played 90’s pop music couldn’t be bad in his opinion! Beyond that, there was something oddly comforting in the music that had him un-tensing for the first time since he’d woken from that horrible nightmare. 

Decided, Gabe moved further into the place and considered his options. There was a long bar directly across from the door with high metal stools spanning the length. Two men in trucker caps and flannel shirts sat at opposite ends of it, both more focused on their food than Gabriel. Beyond the two people Gabriel could see moving about in the kitchen part of the place, the guys were the only people in the place aside from him. Something in him un-clenched even further at the realization he wouldn’t be dealing with a lot of people, and that more than anything, had Gabe slumping into the nearest seat at one of the tables. 

The checkered laminate tabletop was slightly sticky and held the faint scent of lemon-scented cleaner. There was a laminated sheet of paper serving as a menu upon it and Gabe picked it up, looking over the options. The place seemed to have the standard diner fare; a mix of breakfast and dinner options, and full of grease. Toss in an extra large cup of coffee—which yes, they did have—and it was perfect. 

He’d just finished deciding when the waitress bustled out of the back, and having spotted him, came harrying over. The waitress was young with dark eyes and bright blue dyed hair that's been pulled back into a messy bun. She looked about as tired as Gabriel felt, though she managed to give him a smile nonetheless. “What can I get you?”

Gabe tried to match her smile though it was wane at best. He briefly glanced at the menu before looking back to the girl again. “I’ll take the biggest cup of coffee you’ve got, black, and the fried egg platter with a side of toast.” It was a far cry from what Gabriel would normally order but he found he wasn’t all that hungry. Still, he managed to muster up a genuine smile as he looked up at the waitress, “Thank you.” He said as he handed back the menu. 

“No problem!” The girl grinned in return before she turned and headed back to the kitchen. Gabriel watched her go, though the strange sounds of flapping wings had him turned back to the table. There, in the previously empty chair across from him sat a tall white guy with artfully tousled brownish hair, a smattering of freckles, and the strangest green eyes Gabriel had ever seen. He blinked in surprise, one eyebrow arching into his hairline as he eyed the dude. He hadn’t seen him come in but that could be down to the lateness of the hour and the fact he still felt like three quarters of used up, days-old shit. “Can I help you?” He finally asked after eyeing the guy for way too long; sue him, there was something strangely attractive about the dude and Gabriel was only human after all!

“Hello Gabriel,” The man greeted, not at all perturbed by the look of building outrage on Gabriel’s face. “Please don’t worry, I come in peace.” The guy's lips twitched like he had said something funny and was trying not to laugh.

Gabriel blinked, flummoxed. Distantly he heard the familiar tune of Ace of Base ‘I Saw the Sign’ start over the diner’s sound system but all his attention was on the stranger. “Have we met?” He muttered, wondering when his life had gotten so weird that strangers in diners seemed to know who he was. Gabriel was fairly sure he didn’t know the guy, at least he semi-hoped not because it’d have been a damn shame to forget that face.

The guy broke out into an honest to goodness grin that made his strange eyes light up even more. “We have not,” the guy said, sounding strangely sad about that, “But I have met your brother, Castiel.” The way he said Castiel was almost reverent, like whispering a prayer.

Wait. What? Was this one of Cassie’s old hookups? Still intrigued despite himself, ‘cause Gabe was _not_ thinking about hooking up with his little brother’s ex, he leaned forward towards the guy. “Oh yeah?” He narrowed his eyes as he gave the guy a blatant once-over. “I don’t recall seeing you before. What’s your name?”

Were all humans always so abrupt? Dean wondered as he met Gabriel’s appraising gaze with one of his own. It was fascinating to him to find the brothers didn’t look alike, something he’d been expecting. The man in front of him was shorter than Castiel with longer, lighter hair, and honey-whisky colored eyes that were watching him with wary curiosity. Dean remembered to smile in return, hoping to set the human at ease. “I’m Dean.” He said, calm and cool as a cucumber. “I’m the one who pulled your brother from the Pit.”

Gabriel felt his jaw drop; he couldn’t help it. “W-what? Are you serious?!” He sputtered, shocked to the core. He and Castiel had a long discussion on what had happened after he’d woken up in that field, including Castiel meeting Dean. He leaned back, appraising Dean in a new light now that he knew what he was looking at. Now that he knew what to look for he was disappointed in himself for not seeing it earlier. Despite the casual gray band t-shirt and jeans Dean was wearing alongside a black leather jacket there was something about him that screamed “other!”. Perhaps it was the way he was sitting ramrod straight or perhaps it was the way his eyes seemed to glow under the fluorescent lights of the diner. Either way, once known there was no mistaking the creature sitting across him was definitely not a human. “You’re an angel.” He breathed out, shock winning out over the plethora of emotions bubbling up inside him. “You’re really real!”

Dean just stared calmly in the face of Gabriel’s freak out--considering what had happened with Castiel he was hardly surprised. Instead he simply smiled, pleased that Gabriel had cottoned onto him so fast. It’d save a lot of time trying to explain things, something Dean hadn’t been looking forward to doing. “I’m here to help you.” He declared, deciding a direct approach would be most appreciated. 

He was here to help...him? That brought Gabriel up short, and caused his brow to furrow as he frowned. “Help me with what?” He asked, obviously confused. Surely the angel had the wrong person--Gabriel didn’t need any divine intervention!

Dean frowned, obviously confused. Had he gotten something wrong? “My superior, Bobby, said you needed help with the demon Asmodeus.” 

_Holy_ . _Fucking_ . _Shit_ . The blood drained out of Gabriel’s face so fast his head spun dizzily, and for a few heart-stopping seconds there Dean’s profile went worryingly blurry. It was horrifying enough to relive through Asmodeus’ torture while dreaming but to have an _angel_ say he was there to help with it? “Y-y-you’ve got to be j-joking!” Gabriel gasped out, hating the way his voice broke and sounded quivery to his own ears. Even hearing Asmodeus’ name made his insides freeze and had him eyeing the exit speculatively. After what the bastard had done to him he wasn’t even surprised to learn that he was a demon masquerading as a man.

Had he said something wrong? Dean wondered as he watched the way Gabriel’s face had gone slack and pale and his eyes had darted nervously towards the door. Not for the first time he wished Bobby had covered what was the appropriate thing to say to curb a human’s reaction to upsetting news. But since he hadn’t all Dean had to go on was himself, and well, how much worse could he make it? “I do not joke.” He said, voice just as calm as it’d been before. “Asmodeus is a problem that needs dealt with, which is why I’m here.”

Across the table Gabriel shuddered and held up a hand. “Don’t!” He ground out, before looking up to meet Dean’s eyes. “Can you not toss his name out like that?” This whole thing was bad enough but Gabriel knew he wasn’t going to get through it if he had to keep hearing the demon’s name over and over. “No offense, but shouldn’t they have sent an army or something?”

That was a question Dean had not been expecting, and he blinked a few times as he considered it. “I suppose they could have sent in the garrison.” He finally said at last, his tone thoughtful. “It certainly would make things much easier from a logistical standpoint.”

Gabriel didn’t even know what he was supposed to say to that. Instead he just gaped, barely even rousing when the waitress reappeared with his coffee and food. He managed to toss out his thanks but all his attention was on the angel, notably, of whom the waitress didn’t even seem to notice. In fact, it was so disturbing Gabriel found himself fixing said angel with an exasperated look before blurting out: “Seriously? Am I the only one seeing you right now?”

Dean shrugged, managing to make the motion look awkward and stiff as he did so. Even so, a secretive smile crossed his face as he preened, pleased that the hunter had noticed. “No need to drag everyone in on a private conversation.” He said easily, giving the human a look daring him to challenge it. He may not know much but Dean knew enough that one didn’t go discussing demons around humans all willy-nilly.

Gabriel felt his jaw drop open for the second time and inwardly cursed himself for continuing to be so shocked by the angel. He was a hunter, dammit! He should have been reaching for the gun tucked into his waistband, not sitting here trying to wrap his mind around having a conversation with someone only he could see. And yet he couldn’t manage to help himself from asking: “If nobody else can see you, does that mean they think I’m sitting here talking to myself?” Gabriel wasn’t sure what he thought of the notion. At best the others would think he was crazy and leave him alone; at worst they’d probably turn him back into the night after declaring him a loon. 

The angel regarded him for a long second before leaning back in his chair, the motion causing the leather of his jacket to creak. He didn’t say anything for a moment but oh so slowly his lips twitched upwards into a parody of a smirk. “My vessel says that would be unsportsmanlike of me.” He said easily, his tone amused. 

“Vessel? Unsportsmanlike?” Gabriel echoed, thoroughly confused. “I thought demons only had vessels?” He wondered out loud, half wondering if he was still asleep in the motel and this whole thing was some kind of elaborate fever dream or something. Though who was he kidding? Gabriel wasn’t that creative! 

For his part Dean just watched him placidly, letting Gabriel draw his only conclusions before he finally tossed the guy a bone and nodded his head. “Angels take vessels just like demons do.” He said, sounding just as matter of fact as if he was talking about the weather and not the fact he was possessing a living person. “The difference is angels require consent to take someone as a vessel; demons don’t.” He paused, obviously listening to something he alone could hear before he suddenly smiled. “My vessel--Matt--says to tell you he became a vessel willingly if that helps.”

The fact that an angel needed consent to take a vessel was supposed to be reassuring, Gabriel figured, but frankly he felt pretty far from reassured at the moment. How could he not be when his life was effectively circling the toilet? He shuddered and shook his head, pushing the darker thoughts to the back of his head where they belonged. “As fascinating as that is--and we’re totally going to circle back around to that at some point--you aren’t here to tell me about vessels and shit, right?” Gabriel didn’t know where the sudden calmness was coming from to infuse his words but he went with it before he lost his nerve entirely. “You said your...boss? Bobby? Knew how to deal with A-Asmodeus?” His voice broke on the name and he dropped his head to eye his plate rather than see whatever look the angel surely had on his borrowed face over it.

The guy certainly knew how to sober up a conversation, didn’t he? Dean frowned as he watched the hunter’s head drop over his plate until he found himself staring at a head full of messy brown hair that was in desperate need of a comb. “Bobby’s my superior, he’s in charge of my garrison.” He pointed out needlessly, “though I suppose that would make him a boss of sorts by your standards.” He shrugged again, the motion causing the leather of his jacket to creak. “He sent me to help you against Asmodeus.” Given the way things had been going so far it probably would have been a wiser idea had Bobby came himself, Dean considered. But that was neither here nor there since he was the one who was here which meant this mess was now his to deal with, for better or worse. “I believe if we work together we should be able to defeat him!”

Gabriel didn’t make it a habit to snap at people but the way the angel said that so casually, like they’d actually have a snowball’s chance in Hell at defeating Asmodeus was too much. It was the final straw on the proverbial camel’s back and Gabriel would be damned--again, ha!--if he sat there and listened to the angel prattle on useless. “Are you fucking kidding?” He spat, his head jerking upwards with enough force to give him whiplash. “Do you even _hear_ yourself?! You think you can just come down here and we can ‘take care’ of someone as powerful as Asmodeus?! Do you have any idea what that sick freak did to me?! He used me! He stripped me naked and--” He abruptly cut off, just noticing for the first time the way tremors had begun running along his extremities. It took several hard swallows before he went on, though his voice was noticeably quieter now. “He--he tortured me. For..for days! Until…” He trailed off, waving a hand weakly to indicate himself, unable to put it into words.

“He killed you.” Dean said quietly, meeting Gabriel’s gaze head on, his borrowed face a careful mask. “That’s why Bobby sent me here to help you stop him, before he does something similar to someone else.” He paused, eyeing Gabriel for any indication of objection, and upon finding none, he went on. “I know I don’t seem like much and all but Bobby’s rarely wrong. I know you don’t believe me but if he says we can defeat Asmodeus together then I believe him.”

All the anger seeped out of Gabriel like it’d never been there in the first place, leaving him frowning down at his plate of long cooled to the point of cold food. It didn’t look appetizing but he made himself take a few bites from the toast anyway. If nothing else it gave him time to think as he chewed, not that he felt any better about the situation by the time he managed to swallow. “You sound so sure.” He finally offered up at length, though he didn’t bother meeting the angel’s eyes. “I wish I was that sure.” 

That was the whole thing right there, wasn’t it? The angel talked a good game, or well, he sounded good at the least, but how would he do when faced with Asmodeus himself? The better question was how would _Gabriel_ do when face to face with the demon again? The sheer thought made him want to puke which was hardly an intimidation factor. Well, he supposed puking could be one if he aimed for the demon’s snow-white shoes. . . 

“Hey.” Dean reached across the table, completely ignoring the plate of cold food that his sleeve was no doubt resting in the middle of, just to land a hand on Gabriel’s arm. “It doesn’t matter if you believe me or not now. You will.” 

Gabriel only hoped the angel was right about that. Until then where was the harm in trusting him? It wasn’t like either Gabriel or Castiel had any solid ideas on taking on Asmodeus and who knew? Maybe having an angel along for the ride would help things run smoother. Finally looking up he shot the angel a weak smile before gesturing to the diner at large. “What do you say we blow this Popsicle stand? If I gotta tell this thing I only wanna do it once and I know Cassie’s going to want to hear it.” Plus there was beer stashed in the trunk of the car and Gabriel suddenly, desperately needed a drink. Or maybe six. Or hell, probably a whole twelve pack!

Dean didn’t need any prompting--he stood and shot Gabriel a grin, pleased that the human was going along with the plan. Given what little Bobby had told him about the human’s run-in with Asmodeus he knew it had to be hard and therefore was glad he didn’t have to push any harder than he had thus far. “Great!” He said excitedly as he reached out and rested his hand against Gabriel’s shoulder. Between one blink and the next they’d left the diner behind and were standing in the middle of the hotel's parking lot.

“The hell?” Gabriel exclaimed as he moved away instinctively from Dean. He blinked at the parking lot like he’d never seen it before as he tried to wrap his head around just what the hell had happened. “How did you do that?” He asked, a slight note of hysteria in his voice as he rounded on Dean. “What did you do?”

Dean watched the show with a look that clearly read as ‘dude, chill the fuck out’ before he shrugged carelessly. “I brought us back here.” He said, the ‘duh’ part of the statement hanging in the air between them like a lead balloon. If Gabriel was getting all fussed up over that he was really going to freak out when he found out what else Dean could do! “That is your room, isn’t it?” He asked as he pointed to one of the closed motel room doors. “It seemed simpler than walking back.”

“I--You-- _Seriously_?!” Gabriel floundered, opening and closing his mouth like a fish before finally snapping it shut. He shook his head, clearly overwhelmed and suddenly beyond exhausted. A yawn slipped out, proving how tired he really was before he finally shrugged in resignation. It wasn’t like there was any point in debating with the angel anyway seeing as they were already here. “Warn a guy first next time!” He muttered as he headed towards the door Dean had indicated, fishing the key out of his pocket as he went. “You coming in?”

Dean didn’t need to be told twice--between one blink and the next he was at the hunter’s back, half afraid he was going to get the door slammed on him after all. Thankfully the hunter not only let him in but waved him towards the small table and chair set in the corner before he continued on further into the room. Dean followed eagerly, looking around curiously as he went. 

There wasn’t much to see: two beds, one occupied by a deeply sleeping Castiel, the table and chair, two partially open duffel bags, and the general furnishings found in motel rooms everywhere. Dean took it all in as he headed to the chair as indicated and stiffly sat down. Now that he was here he didn’t know what to do with himself, Bobby had never covered what he was supposed to do if he found himself in the hunters motel room! From the adjoining room came the sound of running water before the door opened to reveal Gabriel. He’d taken off his jacket and changed into a simple t-shirt and plaid pajama pants. He looked tired and suddenly Dean knew what to do without being told. 

He watched the hunter settle down on the edge of the unoccupied bed and he took that as a cue to stand. “Our conversation can wait a few hours until morning.” Dean said, eyeing the way the hunter looked ready to fall over at the merest push. Before the hunter could open his mouth to agree, or more likely argue, Dean crossed the room to stand beside him. He reached out pressing two fingers gently to the middle of Gabriel’s forehead. The human’s eyes fluttered and closed as he slipped away into sleep. Dean smiled to himself, satisfied, as he carefully positioned Gabriel back on the bed. It was highly likely the man would be pissed in the morning but Dean had no regrets--things would look better once he’d gotten some sleep behind him. Until then he settled back into the chair alongside the table to wait for the hunters to wake.


	14. Chapter XIV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter warning: The first part of this chapter contains a shower masturbation scene
> 
> Artwork in this chapter is by Aggiedoll.

_“In the still of the night I hear the wolf howl honey, sniffing around your door! In the still of the night I feel my heart beating heavy…”_ The guitar laden sounds of Whitesnake’s ‘In the Still of the Night’ vibrated through the car, trying its best to lift up Castiel’s mood along with the music. Any other time the familiar music combined with the otherwise stillness of the early morning would have been a balm upon his soul but this morning the effect was lost on him. It was a shame too: the sun had just barely crested the horizon leaving the world in a brightening darkness that Castiel loved to witness. Today, however, his hands tightened upon the steering wheel as he first glanced at the passenger seat where Gabriel was sound asleep before moving to glance at the backseat where Dean was sitting stock-still like a statue. Castiel shook his head as he turned his attention back to the road, his mouth settled into a tight line of frustration.

He’d been up less than two hours and already the day felt like it was going to last forever. Castiel had never imagined he’d see Dean again and so he certainly wasn’t prepared to wake up to find the angel right there in his hotel room, less than ten feet from his bed! To say it’d been a shock was an understatement, though it had nothing upon finding out that somewhere along the line his angel and his brother had gone and become BFFs! Castiel grit his teeth just reliving the memory: 

_Castiel lurched upright with a gasp, his heart beating a hard rhythm inside his chest as he looked around wildly. For a few heart-stopping seconds the shadows of the semi-dark hotel room looked like the chains and torture devices of Hell and the ringing screams of the damned echoed loudly in Castiel’s ears. “Please, no more!” He cried, bringing his hands up to cover his ears to block the sounds. He couldn’t go back--he just couldn’t! Tears welled up and slipped down his cheeks in a hot rush though he hardly cared as he stared sightless ahead. “Please!” He sobbed, terror a solid lump in his throat as he began rocking back and forth. “No more! I can’t take any--”_

_“Castiel!” A gruff, oddly familiar broke into the panicked hunter’s thoughts alongside a hand clamping down on his shoulder. Like a rubber band snapping back in place Castiel blinked, brought back to the present only to find Dean standing above him, concern etched into his face._

_“Dean?” He croaked, his voice shot from all the yelling he’d been doing. He blinked, watching as Hell faded away and the dim motel room he’d fallen asleep in the night before took its place. “What happened?”_

_As the night had faded on with Dean sitting there in the hard chair he’d come to realize he actually liked this. There was something strangely satisfying about watching the two hunters sleep and knowing that they were safe under his watch. He had alternated watching the two, pleased to note that Gabriel hadn’t had any more trouble sleeping since they had returned to the room. When the older hunter had awoken once more he had flashed Dean a smile before gathering his clothes and disappearing off into the bathroom. Castiel appeared to be sleeping well, though thanks to how closely he was watching Dean recognized the change in his charge before the yelling had begun. When it did he stood and had moved to Castiel’s side though once there he had paused, unsure of what to do next. Should he try to wake him? Shake him? Luckily the decision was taken out of his hands when Castiel lurched upright, fear etched onto his face. Dean reacted on instinct, reaching a hand out to Castiel’s shoulder even as he leaned in and called the hunter’s name._

_Much to Dean’s relief it worked and he quickly found himself mesmerized by Castiel’s wide blue eyes as the hunter stared up at him. He swallowed hard, struck by the sudden surge of strange emotions swirling through him as he scrambled to answer. “It appeared you were having a bad dream.” He finally got out at length, voice sounding strangely husky to his ears._

_What was the angel doing here? Castiel wondered but he couldn’t seem to make the words get all the way to his mouth. There was a lump in his throat and his heart was still trying its best to gallop out of his chest so really all he had was blinking. And staring. Had the Dean had such green eyes when he met him before? Castiel couldn’t recall yet he couldn’t find it in himself to look away either. All of his earlier fears and concerns about the angel faded away the longer he remained there looking into his eyes and for the first time in a long time Castiel found he actually felt a measure of peace._

_Of course, living the life of a hunter meant peace was fleeting, something that was proven when the bathroom door popped open emitting a wall of steam and a partially dressed Gabriel into the room. He had a towel in his hands, rubbing at his hair and was only clad in dark blue boxers with yellow rubber duckies printed on them. Sensing that he had an audience he paused just over the threshold between the rooms and looked over to where Dean and Castiel were staring at him with matching looks of disbelief. He blinked back, flummoxed to see the two of them so close together and it took a few seconds to get his mouth in gear. “What’d I miss?” He finally asked, eyeing between them speculatively._

_Castiel jerked backwards like he’d been burned and eyed Gabriel owlishly for several long seconds before he suddenly leapt out of bed. He made a mad scramble for clothes before he went dashing into the bathroom, slamming the door shut behind him._

_As soon as the door was safely shut behind him Cas dropped against it with a low groan. Heat filled his cheeks as he squeezed his eyes shut--he was fairly sure he’d never been more embarrassed in his life! What_ was _that? Staring into Dean’s eyes had been intense, to say the least. A thousand different emotions bubbled up inside him running alongside his racing thoughts. He was being dramatic, some deep part of him knew, not that the knowledge helped. Mortification was at the forefront for Gabriel having seen him though; as he finally forced himself to move to undress, Cas had to concede that Gabriel had found him in far more compromising positions before. Despite his brother’s fervent proclamations otherwise Cas was far from a prude--that time in the bathroom stall at a truck stop should have proved otherwise. But why did whatever it was he and Dean just did feel different?_

_Sadly the small, garish-green painted bathroom didn’t have any answers and neither did Castiel by the time he’d finished stripping himself down and turned the shower on. All he and the angel had been doing was staring--fully clothed, mind you!--and yet the whole encounter had felt more intimate than most. People stared at other people all the time so why did it feel so freaking different? “God, you’re such a paranoid bastard!” He berated himself as he stepped into the shower, grateful to find the water was on the warmer side of lukewarm rather than the cold deluge he had been expecting. For a moment he simply stood there and let the water pound down over his head and back and deliberately didn’t think of anything._

_He made it all of two minutes, tops, before the image of startling green eyes flashed in his mind, effectively ruining the zen he was trying to reach. Resigned, he opened his eyes to glower at the off-colored tile of the shower wall. “Son of a bitch!” Cas huffed, rolling his eyes heavenwards as he reached for the shampoo. Even a room away the angel was still on his mind and it was nothing short of_ maddening! _He soaped up his hair and scrubbed it practically on autopilot, his mind more focused on Dean than what his hands were doing._

_Somewhere along the line he traded the shampoo in for body wash, not even realizing it wasn’t his until the rich scent of chocolate flooded his nose. Normally Castiel would be appalled--just because Gabriel liked going around smelling like the human equivalent of candy didn’t mean he did!--but in the moment he found he liked the scent. What would Dean say about it? He wondered as his hands scrubbed over his body. Would he like it? Would he even know what chocolate was?_

_It was easy to picture Dean’s plausible reaction in his mind--all wide eyed wonder as he caught a sniff of Castiel...Would he try to get even closer than he had earlier? Without his notice his hands had slipped lower, spreading the chocolate smelling suds down to his groin. The place where Dean had touched Castiel’s shoulder burned like a brand as he imagined the angel touching him again, though this time his hands would slide lower... A groan slipped unbidden from him as he took himself in hand, unsurprised to find he was already half hard. What would it feel like to have Dean’s hands running down his body? Would they feel as powerful as they had resting on his shoulder? Cas’ eyes slipped closed as he imagined it was Dean’s hands touching his dick instead of his own. He moaned, imaging the way Dean would stroke him faster. Would he enjoy the way Cas hardened under his hands? His hand moved faster as he imagined it. In his mind’s eye he could clearly see Dean standing there before him, pupils blown wide in lust. A whimper slipped in alongside a bitten off moan; he was close. He brought his free hand up, covering his mouth to muffle the sounds as his muscles grew taunt as his orgasm swept over him._

Castiel squirmed in his seat as he felt his face flame at the memory. Now that he’d had time to think about it he was embarrassed by what he’d done. In the heat of the moment it had felt good, better than good, but given too much time to think had quelled any high his orgasm had given him. Not to mention the fear lingering in the back of Castiel’s head of what Gabriel would say if he’d found out what Cas had done. Despite his brother’s fervent ongoing jokes otherwise Cas hadn’t been a virgin since April Kelly had taken him back to her house during their junior year of high school. While he knew for a fact that Gabriel knew about that incident his older brother couldn’t help himself from making jabs about Castiel’s sex life--or lack thereof--since. 

Just because he didn’t attempt to pick up someone at every place they stopped didn’t mean Cas was a prude! If you asked him Castiel would say it meant his brother was nothing but a horn dog and---- **“Everybody groove to the music! Everybody jam! AHHH!”** Castiel jumped, forcefully brought out of his thoughts by the upbeat 90’s ear rock music that was suddenly blaring from the speakers.

“What the hell!?” He shouted but his words were lost under the relenting beat of the tempo and it hardly mattered anyway when the culprit was sitting shotgun anyway. Castiel turned and leveled his best glare at his brother, not that Gabriel looked particularly impressed by it. His older brother’s eyes were twinkling in mirth as he watched Castiel’s expression. Apparently satisfied by whatever Cas’ face was doing he reached out and mercifully turned down the radio to a tolerable level. 

“Don’t give me that dirty diaper look Cassie!” Gabriel taunted, “I could hear you thinking all the way over there! You should be thanking me for breaking you out of your funk!” He crossed his arms over his chest in a way he’d definitely gotten from their mother as he waited to see what Castiel would reply. It was a move that always drove Castiel absolutely crazy and he knew it--a fact proven when one eyebrow raised in challenge.

Before Castiel could open his mouth to reply, and quite possibly launch into a tirade that would eventually turn into a fight, it was Dean who spoke up from the back seat: “What’s a dirty diaper look?” The angel asked, looking curiously between the brothers, hoping one of them would elaborate. He was still sitting stiff and proper in his seat but his green eyes sparkled with curiosity. Both brothers in the front seat froze and stared at each other for a long beat before they both burst into laughter. Dean blinked at them, stunned and curious in equal measure. 

Still it was a good minute or so before the two began to calm down and Gabriel was still chuckling when he finally turned back to look at Dean. “It’s the way Cassie’s face looks ninety percent of the time!” He crowed, obviously delighted at getting to tease his brother. “Haven’t you noticed? He used to look the same way when he was a baby and had a dirty diaper!”

Stuck behind the wheel and unable to reach over and punch his brother like he wanted to, Castiel simply glowered--and probably proving Gabe’s point--while he waited to see Dean’s reaction. If the angel started laughing at him Castiel didn’t know what he was going to do but it was going to be something! 

There was a furrow to his brows as Dean pondered it all. He still didn’t get it and the look on Castiel’s face was far from pleased which made him even more confused. Mercifully he was saved from having to decide from the pounding synthesized beat suddenly blaring out of the radio. Blinking, he looked between the two brothers who didn’t appear to be as awed as he felt as he leaned forward in his seat to ask: “What is that?”

“What’s what?” Castiel asked at the same time Gabriel tipped his head back and broke out into another fit of laughter. This time both Castiel _and_ Dean looked at him like he was crazy which just made Gabriel laugh all the harder. It didn’t help that the whole thing was backed to “Everybody (Backstreet’s Back)” which just made it all the more ridiculous. Gabriel wheezed and shook his head, beyond answering.

Castiel rolled his eyes at his brother’s antics before looking up to meet Dean’s gaze in the rear view. The poor angel looked beyond confused and he could feel his annoyance draining away at the sight of it. “It’s just music.” He told Dean, “It’s probably different than what you’re used to, isn’t it? The band is called the Backstreet Boys, they were pretty popular back in the 90’s.”

“Hey! They’re still the best band ever!” Gabriel spluttered from the passenger seat as he recovered from his second bout of laughter. He tried to look annoyed but it completely failed as he couldn’t even manage to keep a straight face. 

Castiel rolled his eyes again but he didn’t add up any commentary this time. Slowly the humor in the car evaporated leaving a tense silence in its wake. The Backstreet Boys continued to play merrily in the background but nobody paid it any attention. Neither of the three looked at each other as it grew--Castiel focused on the road, while the other two looked out their respective windows. Several miles passed this way before Gabriel finally fidgeted in his seat, unable to stand it. 

“We don’t have to do this, you know.” He said, his voice sounding loud in the silence. His whiskey colored eyes were firmly glued on the landscape passing along outside though his back was a tight line of tension. 

“You know we can’t do that.” Castiel spoke up, his voice a strangled mix of sad and frustrated. “Dean said Asmoudeus needs to be stopped and we’re the only ones who can do so. We can’t let him do to someone else what he did to you.” The ‘and me’ remained unspoken but it hung like a noose in the air between the two of them. 

Gabriel tightened his lips into a thin line, watching his reflection in the window do the same. Castiel was right--of course he was--but that didn’t make him feel any better about this. If anything it made him feel worse because deep down Gabriel wasn’t sure he could do this. Could he confront the man who tortured and raped him and manage to kill him? Considering the thought alone made bile crawl up his throat Gabriel certainly didn’t think so. Even with the reassurance from Dean, of whom they’d found out was actually a soldier, he wasn’t convinced. Asmoudeus seemed so much bigger, so much larger than life than all of them. How were they supposed to kill him?

Gabriel didn’t realize he was shaking when a warm hand came to rest upon his arm. The touch was fleeting but he was grateful for it as he followed the arm back up to find Castiel looking at him with a knowing look. It made his brother seem older than he was and for the first time Gabriel was grateful for it. “Thanks Cassie.” He whispered through a clogged voice before turning back to the window again.

The rest of the ride was spent in silence although it was much more comfortable. But before they knew it the three of them found themselves staring up at the mouth of a familiar alleyway that had both Gabriel and Castiel frowning. Despite their lives changing so much since then the alley looked much the same--the same windswept and sun faded brick walls, the same grungy green dumpster overflowing with refuse, and the same bright red door that stood between the three of them and certain hell.

While the sun was shining high in the sky and the day was quite warm Castiel felt nothing but cold as he stared up at the neon INFERNO sign. Due to the time of day it was off as the club was closed yet the knowledge didn’t make him feel any better about this whole thing. He’d been all for taking down Asmodeus and the club but now that they were there staring it down the doubts were starting to resurface. Suddenly their half baked plan to go storming the place seemed like a very bad idea indeed. He knew they had no choice given they were possibly outnumbered and outgunned but Castiel didn’t feel good about any of this. He did his best to make his face into something resembling neutral as he looked back at Gabriel and Dean. “What do you think?” He asked, reluctantly taking point because someone had to and Gabriel looked about three seconds away from bolting. 

“It looks closed.” Dean spoke up for the first time since they’d left the car. He looked unruffled as he always did but the way his gaze slowly traveled around the mouth of the alley proved otherwise. There was a frown on his face, indicating he didn’t like whatever he was sensing. Castiel looked down the alley as well but he didn’t see anything and gave it up as angelic abilities. “What is it?” He asked, unable to help himself.

“Distress.” Came the reply as Dean’s head swung around so the angel was looking at Castiel fully. “There is great evil beyond the red door.” He stated, sounding disturbed by it. “I sense several non-humans as well as two human females within.” 

“The bastard has two women in there?” Gabriel’s head whipped around so fast he nearly gave himself whiplash, his eyes hard. Where he’d been standing quietly he was now honed in on the conversation like a shark smelling blood. “What the hell are we standing out here for then? We gotta go in!”

“We need a plan first!” Castiel interjected, trying to be the voice of reason. “We can’t just go in guns blazing--what if those women are hurt? We don’t want to cause them further harm and if they haven’t been hurt going in too fast could cause them to be so we need----Gabriel!” Castiel called as he watched his brother’s retreating back head down the alley.

“Oh screw that!” Gabriel spat, too wound up and raring to go to stop and think things through. Castiel had a good point, he knew, but damned if he was going to wait around for them to get their thumbs out of their asses. He’d dealt with Asmodeus before and he knew every second counted. He raised the machete he’d grabbed from the car’s trunk as he went storming up to the door. He’d barely knocked upon it before the door flung open revealing a giant bear of a man with dark hair and a beard who eyed him distrustfully before opening a mouth full of pointed teeth. Gabriel didn’t hesitate--he swung the machete for the fences and sliced through the vampire’s neck like it was tissue paper. Its body dropped as the head went rolling...only to come to a stop at the feet of Castiel and Dean, who had finally caught up to him. “About time you two showed up!” Gabriel offered up before he hopped over the body and headed down the long unlit hallway that led deeper into the club. Gabriel kept an ear out, listening to the quiet sounds of Castiel and Dean following him as they moved deeper. Despite the rows of doors lining the hallway Gabriel ignored them all in favor for the one at the very end. 

Unlike the rest of them which had been painted deep red the final door was an ominous black and it led straight down to the basement. If there was one place Asmodeus would be, it’d be there. Sweat had broken out on Gabriel’s neck and forehead as he looked at the door, remembering the last time he’d been confronted with it. He’d been half delirious with pain and beat to hell but he vividly remembered the way the matte black paint seemed to be a void opening in front him, like a monster with its jaw unhinged ready to devour his soul. He shuddered and stuffed the fear back down with effort before he slowly reached out for the handle. Just like last time it opened on soundless hinges as it swung inward revealing nothing but more darkness beyond. 

Gabriel froze, clearly recalling the brightly lit staircase that should have been there but he was too late--before he could turn to tell his companions it was a trap something hard and deadly fast swung out of the darkness and cracked him right in the head. Gabriel crumpled and went down hard to the sounds of his name being called from somewhere far away... Things devolved into confusion fast as Castiel and Dean went running and the lights clicked on somewhere down below revealing the brightly lit staircase and a bearded man with dark hair and a blood-splattered white suit standing there behind Gabriel’s collapsed body. 

**-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-**

Gabriel came back to the waking world in fits and starts, not truly conscious of anything beyond the ringing in his ears and the pounding headache blooming from his left temple. For a long time he simply languished there, unable to muster up the energy to push past the pain to see the outside world. What had happened? His memory seemed as foggy as his head and the memories lingered just on the edge of his awareness. 

How long he lay caught between waking and not he didn’t know but gradually the pain lessened enough that Gabriel felt he could possibly open his eyes. He regretted it instantly as the brightness of the room stabbed a sharp blade through his eyes before he even got them fully open. He hissed in discomfort as he squeezed his eyes shut again. Fuck, what had happened? He tried to cast his mind back, to _think_ but the stabbing pain rose up before he could begin to figure it out. A moan slipped out of him as the throbbing started up again, moving upwards towards his eye. 

“Shit! Gabriel? Are you with us?” A panicked, but welcomingly familiar voice--Castiel--hovered close by and Gabriel felt something in his chest ease at the sound. He moaned again in response, the only one he seemed capable of doing and tried again to open his eyes. He was a little more successful this time, having managed a little slit that was instantly overtaken by worried blue eyes and a familiar head of dark tousled hair. “C-Cas.” Gabriel rasped out, glad to see his brother there. He still didn’t have the foggiest idea what the hell had happened but as long as his little brother was okay then everything else could wait.

“Thank god!” Castiel breathed, slightly alarming Gabriel as he watched through watery eyes as Castiel’s face just crumpled right before him. It was a rare thing to see his brother cry and the fact that he was doing so now ratcheted up his concern to new levels. Castiel notably didn’t answer--if anything it just seemed to make him hunch in on himself as he shook under the force of his sobs. 

Gabriel blinked slowly, unable to do much else. Gradually he became aware of little things--like the persistent sounds of beeping around them and the smell of antiseptic lingering in the air. That combined with the dawning realization that he was shaking alongside his brother spelled it out in shaking neon lights: he was in a hospital. The realization didn’t change things; he was still confused and obviously concussed but since Castiel was there everything had to be okay. 

He hadn’t realized he had drifted off to sleep again until Gabriel found himself rousing at sounds of quiet talking going on around him. “How is he doing?” He heard Dean ask, listening as the sounds of footsteps the angel came closer to the bed. He stopped beside what Gabriel assumed to be Castiel’s side. “He woke up for a few minutes.” Castiel replied, his voice tired. “I don’t think he’s aware of much, they have him pretty sedated.”

“I’m sorry we didn’t get there sooner.” Another voice, somewhat softer than Dean’s spoke up from the opposite side of Gabriel’s bed. It was enough to prompt him into opening his eyes again and he was relieved to find it was easier this time. Blinking against the light Gabriel looked up to find an unfamiliar set of hazel eyes looking down from a concerned face. “Who’re you?” He slurred, sounding as tired as Castiel had, though he was bolstered by the look of relief that passed across the man’s face. 

“I am Samael, Dean’s brother. And this is Garth.” The angel said, waving at the lankly looking man standing guard near the door. “We’re glad to properly make your acquaintance.” Behind him Garth waved though he remained at his post by the door.

“Nice to meet you,” Gabriel grinned back tiredly before lazily rolling his head to the other side where Castiel and Dean were. His brother was sitting in a wheelchair pulled up to the bedside and looked pale and drawn in a hospital gown. Gabriel lingered over the obvious bandage circling around Castiel’s skull and the cast adorning his right ankle. “You okay, Cassie?” Gabriel asked, pleased to note Dean looked relatively unharmed where he stood next to his brother.

Castiel laughed--he couldn’t help it. He hunched over as far as he could in the chair, his shoulders shaking with obvious relief and the slightly hysterical sounds of someone who’d been sitting in the hospital for far too long. “We won.” He finally replied in a choked voice and lifted his head to grin at his brother through the tears streaming down his face. “Thanks to Dean and Sam and Garth we won. The women are safe, they’re being treated but they’re expected to live. Asmodeus is dead.”

Gabriel closed his eyes and slumped further into the bed. Relief flooded through him sharp and welcoming, more potent than any of the drugs that were being pumped into him. They’d won! He didn’t remember the why or how but in the moment that didn’t matter. “We won.” He echoed weakly, a smile spreading across his lips as he drifted off again. “We really won.”


	15. Chapter XV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Art in this chapter is by Aggiedoll

**Six Weeks Later**

“Hey Cas! I got your fav, man! Bacon double cheese---awe man!!” Gabriel exclaimed, hefting the heavy bag from the local burger joint down the road as he pushed open the door to the motel room they were currently staying in. His enthusiasm was short-lived however, as he froze on the threshold at the sight that greeted him. While his brother and his angel had done a heck of a lot of denying--something Gabriel hadn’t bought--nothing quite prepared him to come back from a food run to find his little brother’s tongue down an angel’s throat. At his announcement the two had lept away from each other like they’d been burned but it was already too late--Gabriel was sure he was going to need brain bleach to get that mental image out of his head!

_“Seriously?!”_ He whined, lowering the bag as he slowly made his way into the room. “You two couldn’t have waited until later? You knew I was coming back!” He huffed out a dramatic sigh as he crossed the room to the small table and chairs in the corner, carefully not meeting either one of their eyes. If he did it’d be game over, for Gabriel sucked at keeping a straight face, especially when he was as pleased as he was now. It was a little weird to know his brother was hooking up with an angel but Gabriel found he was getting used to it. The week spent in the hospital as they recovered from the incident at the Inferno had opened his eyes to a lot of things, most notably the way Dean and Castiel gravitated towards one another like they were the only two in the world. It was fascinating and disgusting in the way young love often was and Gabriel was all down for it--just not when it was impacting his mealtimes.

“Sorry Gabe.” Castiel said as he edged his way closer to his brother and his food. He had healed up well in the intervening weeks and looked happier than Gabriel could remember seeing him. While Gabriel was fairly sure a lot of that had to do with the angel coming up behind him he was grateful to see it nonetheless. Castiel deserved to heal from all the trauma he’d been through--they all did--and now with Asmodeus gone it finally felt like they were on their way to making it a reality. 

Gosh, he’d really gone and gotten sappy somewhere along the way, hadn’t he? Gabriel shook his head at himself as he opened the bag and started divvying up the food. He could be sappy as he wanted later--after his stomach was full. “So lover boy, how long are you planning on staying this time?” He asked Dean as he took a seat at the table and began unwrapping his burger. Since things had calmed down in the wake of Asmodeus’ death the angel had a habit of popping in for a few days before returning to his duties in heaven. 

Dean shot a glower at Gabriel--and boy, he’d really been spending too much time with Castiel!--as he pulled out one of the chairs alongside Castiel and sat down. While he didn’t need to eat to sustain his vessel he’d taken to sitting with the hunters during meals nonetheless. “I should be able to stay a few days.” He said as he reached out to steal one of Castiel’s fries to examine. “Things are quiet back home.”

Castiel simply watched the interaction between his brother and his angel, caught somewhere between annoyed and amused and landing more firmly in fond territory. While he hated his brother’s annoying cracks and comments he was beyond grateful that he was there to make it. Things with Asmodeus had been dicy and Castiel knew if it hadn’t been for Sam and Garth’s good timing at showing up none of them would have made it, especially Gabe. The sight of his brother laying so still and pale in a hospital bed hadn’t receded from his mind in the intervening weeks, not that Castiel had shared that tidbit. He’d tell Gabriel eventually--because sooner or later his brother would suss it out of him--but for now he was willing to simply bask in the contentment. “It’ll be nice to have you stay around,” He said to Dean, fully ignoring the look on Gabriel’s face as he unwrapped his burger. Things had been surprisingly quiet for them as well and not for the first time Castiel let his mind wander to all the things he could share with Dean in the meantime. While it hadn’t come as a surprise to either him or Gabriel to find out Dean hadn’t been on Earth much before it’d made the brothers more determined to show him everything they could. Castiel chewed as he thought about it; perhaps they’d be able to talk Dean into going to see a movie before he had to leave again. Castiel had always wanted to try out that old cliche about making out in a dark movie theater...

A sudden knock at the motel room door broke through the companionable silence causing all three of them to look up. Gabriel raised his eyebrows at Castiel as he put his half-eaten burger down and rose. “Are you expecting company?” He asked, reaching for the silver knife in his belt at his brother’s shake of the head. Inwardly his nerves were aflutter, wondering who could possibly be on the other side of the door. Balthazar had still been in London the last they had spoken which left... any number of unsavory creatures out for revenge. 

Tightening his grip on the knife Gabriel reached out and slowly pulled the door open with the other hand. _Please be someone friendly!_ He prayed, not up to dealing with baddies who made house calls. Thankfully his prayer was answered as standing on the other side of the door was none other than Dean’s angel brothers. Both were dressed in jeans and flannel, and in Sam’s case an ugly orange jacket that only an angel could love. Gabriel let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding and lowered the knife. “Samshine! Garth! What brings you to our humble abode?” He greeted as he stood back to allow the angels entrance to the room. Ever since they had helped dispatch Asmodeus the two angels had been showing up almost as frequently as Dean did.

“My name is Samael.” The taller angel proclaimed in a resigned voice as he stepped inside, not that the reminder would do any good--Gabriel seemed to come up with a new name for him every single time they’d met. Garth, by contrast, just grinned as he followed Sam inside before bee-lining to the table where Dean and Castiel were. Gabriel watched the angel go with a chuckle and a shake of his head before turning to close the door. 

When he turned back he was surprised to find Sam still standing there, watching him. While that wasn’t totally unusual--the angels were a little on the _weird_ side after all--the look on his face made Gabriel pause. “What’s up?” He asked lightly, though there was a part of him that was already dreading the answer. He should have known better than to think the angels were there for a social call--they didn’t have the attachment Dean did to the hunters.

“There is a situation.” Sam said, his voice still oddly informal despite his exposure to the humans. “Bobby’s already briefed us and we’re going to need your help.” His hazel eyes travelled past Gabriel to lock onto Castiel and Dean. “We have work to do.”

  
  
The End.

**Author's Note:**

> I know some people like to know the music that inspires stories so I thought I'd share what I listened to while writing this for those who are curious:  
> The first half of this story was heavily influenced by Louden Swain's Eskimo album, especially the song "Wave"  
> Other notable songs are Whitesnake's "In the Still of the Night" from their 1987 album, The Backstreet Boy's "We've Got it Going On", Seal's "Crazy", and Ace of Base's "I Saw the Sign"


End file.
